Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML
Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML
Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML
Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
Today, I came back from school camp and really had to go to the toilet. I ran to the nearest one, which was by the principal's office. After I finished, I tried to flush the button. Turns out the water was turned off so it wouldn't flush. I bolted. The principal is now stuck with my unwanted present. FML
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
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Top comments
dianeface 0
Trust me, the high school kids will think its hilarious.
This_Guy 0
Just tell them that you actually did your job, but some kids drew that when you left.
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Comments (261)
alexgisforme3 0
im sorry but if you ask me thats pretty dumb
mike101abc 0
But, no one asked you...
gccobra 0
R u kiddig its awesome
WhatsOpTic 11
Are you kidding, you can't spell
shankzilla 0
this sounds a lot like the FML where the kid drew a penis with a lawnmower and then ran out of gas. wait, it is, you just replaced 'lawnmower' with 'hose' you little fibber.
RunZoneFive 0
My graduation ceremony is in a few weeks and I would be PSYCHED if something like this happened. Wait to go man, you're going to have those kids laughing a lot
Lingonberry668 0
I hope u no it's way to go not wait to go... lmao noobb!!
LacrosseChick97 0
Yes, I hope YOU know that's it's not u
BubbleGrunge84 7
227 and it's know, not no...and my brain hurts from having to figure out that you left quotations out of that sentence...
sunshyne84_fml 0
I sure hope you're female
baby_love 0
perfect timing for the thing to break, makes a great story huh?
redbluegreen 41
I agree with #1. Hopefully, you'll have a job after the graduation ceremony? I don't think the janitor ever gets blamed for anything, its almost always the kids.
fishburger420 0
that is awesome. don't sweat it
the_boss_fml 0
haha that is awesome!!!
GBPackersGal 0
you have an amazing taste in baseball teams! sf giants 2010 world series champions!!
luvable_loozer 0
what are ya -- 12 years old?
ginga_ninja 0
FYL for being a high school janitor and YDI for drawing penises. sad person