Today, my husband of 5 months admitted he is jealous of my dog. I've had the dog for 16 years. He admits to wanting to drop it off at the shelter while I'm at work. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
You're my mommy now
Today, and everyday since we got a puppy in March, my husband is jealous of the puppy who follows me everywhere. He was the one that wanted the puppy and now he practically hates it. FML
Heartless swine
Today, my wife isn't speaking to me and is considering separation because I got rid of the puppy she surprised me with for my birthday. She knows I hate dogs and I'm severely allergic to them, but thought it would be a happy case of "Dad later falls in love." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
Bad omen
Today, my boyfriend apparently lied to me when he'd said we could get a dog one day. I bought a puppy for him in secret but as soon as he saw it he was all, "What the hell is that? We’re not keeping it." It’s now with his parents, as he didn’t want it overnight or even in the house. FML
Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML
Today, I told my husband that I think he has ADHD. He was offended and began to argue, then he got distracted by a dog outside. FML
Good boy
Today, I realized my boyfriend's dog is more excited to see me than he is. FML
My new friend
Today, it's my wife's birthday. Since I had work, I gave her $200 to spend on herself and left. When I came back with dinner and the movie she wanted, I found her with a dog. She is very attached to him because the shelter was going to put him down. I love him, but I'm allergic to dogs. FML
Call the cops
Today, I dumped my boyfriend. He responded with kidnapping my dog while I was at work. He texted me a picture of him holding a piece of chocolate to his mouth, threatening to feed it to him if I didn’t get back with him. I took him back because I can’t bear my life without my dog. FML
Man's best friend
Today, my estranged husband told me he’s sad that he lost the dog. He didn’t mention anything about losing me, his wife. FML
Top comments
whiskey'swino 15
Husband needs to be taken to a shelter. Jerk.
cdaspirit 15
I hope your dog is chipped god forbid he really does that
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Comments (41)
Shawnie Gallant 24
Time for doggy day care! Bill your husband.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Wow, that's petty and downright cruel. I'd say drop HIM off at the shelter and see how HE likes it. But how did the dog situation not come up before you were married?
JamesFuckingBond 13
Honey just throw the whole husband away
TheSminty1 17
Why? Can't he wait a week before nature does what nature does
chosha_fml 27
I’m glad he admitted it. I just hope the conversation that came after was NOT about how you have to change and show the dog less attention and WAS about how your husband has to change to manage his unreasonable jealousy.
purplemonkey 7
Divorce, hell this may call for straight up annulment. If you really want to make it work nanny cam the shit out of your house.
Kayla Rodriguez 2
Hell no! Keep the dog get rid of the insecure man lol
lisyaorancrazed 16
This needs an update. Please tell us you filed for divorce.
tounces7 28
Keep the one that has stuck with you for longer, and drop the other one off somewhere.
Pornstartled 14
The dog is sixteen years old, it'll soon join the big kennel in the sky. Problem solved.