Today, my husband jokingly said to me, "I think you love Captain Kirk more than me." Without thinking, I said in a serious tone, "I think I do, too." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I asked my husband if he thought I was pretty. He replied "compared to what?" He was serious. FML
Is it not your baby as well?
Today, I'm starting to realize my wife's baby loves me more than my wife. FML
NRA fanboy
Today, I finally confronted my husband about his silicon *wedding ring* having rifle bullets on it. He said, "I love you as much as I love guns." I clarified, "As much as?" to give him an out. He replied, 100% serious, that he really loves his guns. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend why she can't treat me like the way I treat her. She said, "because you love me more than I love you." FML
Moody blues
Today, I noticed my husband was acting moody, and I asked him what was wrong. He replied that he didn't know, so trying to lighten the mood, I facetiously said, "It's 'cause you're stuck with me, isn't it?" He nodded, trundled off, and hasn't shown his face since. FML
Puppy love
Today, my husband is furious because I accused him of being in love with my best friend. He talks about her constantly, perks up like a puppy when she comes over, and occasionally only gets erections if I talk about her. Even the kids have noticed how moonstruck he is. FML
Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML
Today, I kissed my husband and said, "I love you." That's when our 5 year-old son said to my husband, "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML
What's so funny?
Today, I said to my significant other, "I think I'm a pretty good catch." She started laughing so heavily that tears came out of her eyes. FML
Top comments
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
That escalated kirkly.
HappyItalian 38
A very sad moment of silence. If you need me, I'll be on the bridge.
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Comments (50)
msmedieval 11
Kirk was a hottie, if hubby takes it personally sit him down & watch some episodes together. Maybe he'll develop a man-crush on Kirk himself? Haha
rojoesydney 6
William Shatner when he was young or now?
fader48080 10
I could live with being your second choice to a star trek character as long as it isn't kirk and you accepted the fact that you would probably be my second choice after Dax.
Jbrady43 13
Looks like you done spocked up...
brenanafish 18
Same.
justanotherday7 7
That's Great! Good One
TheAspieDork 27
Could be worse, my last name is Kirk, and I have Star Trek jokes following me constantly.
SiraSiemens 21
see id totally get that if you loved captain picard... but kirk??? you deserve what evers commin to ya
ShiteRapper 1
What a great website.
ShiteRapper 1
This is awesome.