Today, my husband and I were getting intimate when a notification for a game popped up on his iPad. He immediately shoved me aside so he could take care of his baby dragon. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Game on
Today, I realized that my husband has a video games addiction. I am currently pregnant; he brought us to the same country he's in so we can finally live together, only for me to witness him being glued to his laptop all day and all night playing WoW. He's forgotten I even existed. FML
Today, my husband got angry and stormed out of the house because he claims I wasn't pressing the buttons he told me to while playing Pokemon. FML
Today, my husband and I were in bed when the alarm on his phone went off. He then told me that he had to 'sound the horn' and went over to his laptop. Wondering what that meant, I peered over at his laptop. It turns out hunting for mice on Facebook is more important than procreating. FML
Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML
Today, I was using my iPad for a presentation. I locked it and left it connected to the projector while I prepared to present. When I turned around to begin, I realized there had been a push notification from Groupon asking if I was still interested in a dildo. FML
Today, I went into labor and got my husband drive me to the hospital. Instead of staying by my side, he rushed back home for a World of Warcraft raid. His excuse? His friends were counting on him and they'd be pissed if he let them down. FML
Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML
Today, when my boyfriend said it was time to play with his baby, I figured he was talking about me. He meant his Xbox. FML
Today, I called my fiancé just to tell him how much I love him, as a sweet gesture. He yelled at me for interrupting his video game and blamed my "neediness" on the fact that I'm menstruating. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML
Top comments
chickenwalrus 14
Baby dragon > sex?
stfu_bam 5
Uh hello! We gotta take care of our dragons! Psh people these days just don't understand. Side note - What level is he on?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (248)
msphatb00ty 0
Ummm dragonvale rocks. I'm level 17 8-).
JiggyBoo123 11
This is horrible, the first thing I thought of after reading this was my incredibly nerdy friend Hans and his wife. Uggghhhh.
firemedic919 0
**** him go find one that will **** you and get over it
THE_A_TEEN 28
1) They're married 2) You sound like if you think relationships are easy to get into. 3) Sex is an important part but leaving him, a married man, for another jackhole just for sex? 4) There are other ways for a woman to get pleasured instead of sex, masturbation. Jeez, you sound like a dirty ****. You ****...
rattusrattus 19
Anyone who's played original Sims will now the chaos an uncaredfor baby dragon can cause.
icic6772 0
Hey!!!! It's a baby DRAGON!!!
HoboSmeller 6
to OP, since your husband is playing with his toys, you should play with yours, if you have any that is.
kmorasgirl 2
Macfag
BlondieAlliex 0
Haa . Dump his ass . Either he's a nerd , or youre awful at sex .
bizarre_ftw 22
Aw Come On!!!! It's a dragon!!! A BABY dragon!!!!! How can you be pissed at him? :}
holdenthemonkey 3
You just do not understand the ramifications if you do not take care of a baby dragon. Geesh.... It could have been the last time you ever had sex if he ignored its calling.