Today, my husband and I had our first prenatal appointment. My doctor told us we shouldn't have sex during the first trimester, "just to be safe". He has no evidence to back this, but now my husband is too scared to touch me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
True Love Waits
Today, my husband and I had sex for the first time because we pledged we wouldn't have sex until we were married. He's terrible. FML
Bad timing
Today, the doctor finally gave us the OK to have sex at 37 weeks pregnant. We were going to make love that night, but she was tired so we planned for the next day. She goes for an appointment and has emergency induction. We haven't had sex since April. No sex until next year. FML
Denied
Today, my fiancé decided that we shouldn't have sex before we get married. Even though we've been doing it for years. We can't get married right now due to Covid. FML
Busting makes me feel good
Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones made her extremely horny. The doctor said that intercourse during pregnancy was very healthy, so we decided to do it. Let's just say that the bumpy ride didn't help her morning sickness. FML
Genius
Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML
Big baby
Today, my husband said sex is too weird because I'm pregnant with our first baby. He gets very grumpy without sex. I'm very horny with hormones. Only 6 more months. FML
What have you been up to?
Today, my period was a few days late, so my anxiety kicked in and I told my husband I was worried about being pregnant. He pointedly said that pregnancy requires sex, and I suddenly remembered we haven't had sex in months. I haven't cheated, but good luck convincing his suspicious ass of that. FML
Today, my husband is sulking because he "can't" have sex with me. I've tried initiating things multiple times, but he keeps saying no, because I'm pregnant and he says it'd be exactly the same as having sex with his own kid. FML
Today, my fiancé told me that the thought of having sex with a pregnant woman repulsed him. I'm pregnant. He's glad he got that off his chest FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML
Top comments
Tripartita 45
Uuuh, what evidence would you require, OP? It just seems to be common sense that sperm in your husband's urethra will get jealous and try to pull the newly formed zygote out. Honestly, people these days…
usnwife 18
Unless you have some issue that puts you at risk, that's total crap and I would be finding a new OB asap! If your dr doesnt base anything on facts then you are in for one rough pregnancy...what's next, not lifting your arms above your head or being on your feet at all? On the plus side, your husband seems really sweet and wants to take care of you and baby, however misguided he may be!
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Comments (41)
lakesofire 13
Go to a different doctor. take your husband with you.
sturschaedel 27
I agree. Find a new, competent doctor and let them explain to your hubby that the previous doc was a quack. Nothing wrong at all with sex during pregnancy in ANY trimester. Also, just listen to your body. Reproduction is one of the most basic function of the female human body. You can definitely rely on your instincts. And when you are horny, have sex.
usnwife 18
Unless you have some issue that puts you at risk, that's total crap and I would be finding a new OB asap! If your dr doesnt base anything on facts then you are in for one rough pregnancy...what's next, not lifting your arms above your head or being on your feet at all? On the plus side, your husband seems really sweet and wants to take care of you and baby, however misguided he may be!
ptoka 20
Well, umm... Anyone with a biology background can tell you that the female body, especially under stress or excitement during an ****** can usually self-terminate a baby within the first couple months. Women self-abort all the time when conditions aren't right for the body to continue the development of a fetus. So it's not that farfetched at all, in reality.
Angelrose2004 17
Ptoka, your biology background doesn't include Google, does it? I would love to see a credible source that says orgasms cause "self-abortion." That is by far the most far-fetched thing I've heard in a long time.
klutz44 28
9 - was that an attempt at sarcasm? I'm well into my 3rd pregnancy and have never been told to abstain from sex while pregnant. OP, definitely find a new OB.
fishinpink 20
ptoka is actually somewhat correct in what was said. I remember in both my pregnancies when I had an ****** I could viscuously feel my uterus contacting and it scared me but I never talked to the doctor about it yet neither did I miscarry or self abort as a result. so basically it's all about how comfortable the woman feels about how her body responds with it (assuming she has no abnormal conditions diagnosed by the doc which would HAVE FACTS). And don't worry, OP there are many many men who have this apparent fear of "poking the baby" or the baby "seeing his junk" lol (watch Knocked Up) even I was affected by the "I don't want to hurt the baby" response lol it'll get better
usnwife 18
Yes, ****** can cause some minor contractions, but in a healthy pregnancy they put you at no extra risk. I was put on "pelvic rest" (no sex, no heavy lifting, limit time on my feet) at the end of my last pregnancy due to preterm labor in both my previous pregnancy as well as that one at the time, and it is common to suggest refraining from sex early in pregnancy if there is a history of miscarriage or other complications, but the majority of pregnancies have no such issues and sex is perfectly healthy. Since the dr had no reasoning for it and she doesnt mention any issues I believe it is safe to assume OP has a normal healthy pregnancy, therefore no reason to eliminate sex. I have had 4 kids, 6 drs, and did plenty of research (scholarly, not basic google) of my own, so this "basic biology" information is as reliable as OP's dr!
JazmyneJayy 14
Wrong wrong wrong! Yes spontaneous abortion (miscarriage) is common but it is not due to the contracting of the uterus during ******. Pregnancy is 1000% safe during the first trimester unless you have had previous miscarriages. The most common reasons for spontaneous abortion include chromosomal abnormalities that make it impossible for the fetus to grow & thrive & a blighted ovum where a gestational sac develops but no zygote is ever formed. There are also the situations where the woman's body rejects the pregnancy before she even knows she's pregnant. You are misinformed and spreading your misinformation to others please stop. You are no better than the ignorant Doctor. Without medical reason such as spotting or heavier vaginal bleeding which can happen and a pregnancy come to term fine there is no reason not to have sex. I spotted the first 4 weeks of my pregnancy every time I orgasmed and after a pap smear and transnational ultrasound I bleed bright red. It is extremely common.
Rabite 28
But how great would it be if you could have an abortion by having an ******? Best birth control ever!
derpina72 23
OP, I really hope you read these comments and listen to usnwife! I have a son, and I've never heard anything about abstaining from sex in the first trimester, unless of course you were high risk, which based off this, you're not. My main worry, here, is that you get a new OB ASAP. If they already don't know wtf they are talking about, you absolutely DO NOT need that during your labor. Please, please, please find a new OB and have a happy, healthy pregnancy! :)
Bearsmomma 30
14, that is exactly what an ****** is...uterine contractions. If a woman is uncomfortable with feeling the ****** (which is hard to imagine-at least for me) then she should avoid it, but otherwise, it's fine and supposed to happen.
fishinpink 20
bearsmomma- thank you!!! it made me feel really uncomfortable in my second pregnancy after I knew what labor contractions feel like. Bc of that I have it 2 more shots and with the same result and each one being painful I made myself hold off till it was D day. but I also turned out to be high risk midway in bc of some varying factors like severly high stress and gestational diabetes. I also made the worst most ducked up decision in the world to get high and even continue to smoke cigarettes and I am dying inside bc of that (august 5th I will finally have 6 months clean and sober praise God). so all things tied in together (i mostly blame the druga) led me into delivery at just 33 weeks. my daughter was in the NICU for 2 months before her new parents were able to take her home. (yes I chose adoption for her bc of the way I was living and the way I treated her while she was still inside me. I knew I couldn't give her what she would need outside of love and I wasn't willing to put her thru all that i have been thru dragging her around from state to state without a father and strange men in and out of my life. she didn't deserve that kind of life.) usnwife- thank you for your scholastic information. so many need to read that and I hope OP does
Bearsmomma 30
I'm sorry for your pain fishinpink. It's very brave of you to share your story. I smoked through my pregnancies (cigarettes only) and also was high risk for reasons you mentioned. my boys were both in NICU but for no more than a week. I know it's hard to leave your baby behind at the hospital, though I can't imagine what you've been through. Hope you're doing well now and CONGRATS ON YOUR SOBRIETY!
fishinpink 20
thanks bearsmomma! it was really hard to leave her but they did let me come back to the hospital to visit her until she got to to home. she was born 12/19/13 so the first time I got to go back and see was on Christmas day and on new years day I got to hold her. although it was hard it was probably my best Christmas and new years gifts in the world. and I'm lucky I that her mom is someone I grew up with in dance classes. I actually looked up to her in so many ways.
Tripartita 45
Uuuh, what evidence would you require, OP? It just seems to be common sense that sperm in your husband's urethra will get jealous and try to pull the newly formed zygote out. Honestly, people these days…
Welshite 40
I call it survival of the fittest. Only the worthy endure.
ClairvoyantVamp 19
A hunger game of sorts, with the prize being the ability to remain alive in a cold, uncaring world.
josephbates 8
I'm picturing attack on titan with all the sperm zipping around attacking a fetus with a creepy grin slowly swatting at em all with the theme song playing... Yup it's playing in your head now too
jbuckets_404 39
#5: Unfortunately, the news often provides examples of "YDI," too.... Sometimes, it's even us! lol
Malsain_fml 10
I would start with the same "what evidence would you require, OP?". If doctor says "no", well then it's a "no". If she wants to see another doctor, she can. But unless some real specialist come and says to them they can have sex safely, well they would better not have any.
waleedma 18
Been there.. Done that...
Adyingpine 10
I think your husband is being careless you need to be put into an isolation camper with padded walls and 3 levels of disinfectant for visitors if you need to leave wear a bubble for safety and remember NO TOUCHING! good luck with the baby
OlRed 28
Unless OP offers her husband some waffles and sausage... Wait is her husband the same OP from that FML?
tash901 31
It would be understandable if you had a medical condition that could affect you or your baby but this doesn't seem to be the case, your doctor sounds very old fashioned, you may need to get a new doctor even if it is a bit of hassle now it may make your pregnancy easier for you. Your partner sounds like a great man that cares deeply for you and your little one in waiting :) Good luck with the baby I wish you all the best! :)
jackiegarcia20 6
I was high risk, and never told that. You should maybe meet a new Dr. Congratulations and good luck!
RinoaHeartilly 36
I read that as Doctor Congratulations and it made me very happy.
gigiskye 20
Samee
MandieL 27
I too was high risk and told sex was fine. Later in the pregnancy they told me an ****** could produce some contractions, but it would be more like Braxton hicks.
MiaTheMartian 21
I mean, the doctor has no evidence to back that up, but, shout out to your husband for wanting to be careful
Knittedbirch 8
Find a new doctor right away, OP. I sincerely hope it doesn't, but if something does go wrong, you need a good, knowledgeable doctor on your case.
sarcasmismyno1 22
That is some medieval nonsense right there!