Today, my grocery shopping consisted of Poptarts, SpaghettiOs, Lucky Charms, Popsicles, Easy Mac, and Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother went shopping. She bought three boxes of Popsicles and a giant stuffed dog. She did not buy dinner or toilet paper. I've eaten nothing but cereal and popcorn for three days now. FML
Today, as I searched for food to take to work for lunch, I noticed that the only recent addition to our fridge is chocolate milk and popsicles. My mom went grocery shopping yesterday. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store, and I realized that all I bought was cat food and $30 worth of protein bars. Yes, I have become THAT single woman. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping. When I got to the frozen foods, I saw some Lean Pockets, which I haven't had in forever, so I bought a couple of boxes. Around lunch time, I was hungry and thought I could have some, until I realized why I stopped buying them: I don't have a microwave. FML
Today, I accidentally washed an entire box of macaroni and cheese with a load of laundry. I'm 25 and do not have kids. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend to the store to get groceries while I was at work. Instead of what I listed, he came back with hot pockets, ice cream and beer. I'm lactose intolerant and pregnant. FML
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
Today, my fiancee asked me to text her a grocery list. I asked for meat, fruit, vegetables, you know, the staples. She came back with tons of sugar cereal, pop tarts, cookie dough, and other unhealthy crap. We have no other food, our monthly budget is gone, and junk food gives me horrible stomach cramps. FML
Today, we have nearly no food in the house. My husband went shopping with the kids and returned with a sack of tomatoes. Time to make lunch. FML
Today, I was craving some popcorn, so I went to the supermarket and bought the microwaveable type. When I got home, I remembered I didn't have a microwave. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Blasphemy! You forgot the cocoa-puffs.
DocBastard 40
What the hell is wrong with you? You consider THAT food? How could you possibly live on that crap? You clearly forgot the Oreos and beer.
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Comments (151)
chosha_fml 27
I'd be more disturbed if someone WITH kids had a cart full of that crap.
Ksweety_fml 27
Sounds good. I would get it too, and I'm 22.
Nurd4lyfe 7
What?! No Sunny D to wash it all down?
AznShadowWc 9
I thought twinkies went out
SDee91 6
They came back people panicked for nothing
tehdarkness 21
Gross. You should join Pinterest, there are a ton of easy recipes on there. Also google the ingredients in the stuff you bought...
kinsmas 18
I know how you feel. When I cook for myself I have no motivation to make a decent meal. I'd rather plop a can of stew in a pot and heat that up than make a full meal for myself.
ImTheAlpha 30
Are you a college student, OP? Or do you just not cook?
jrock9093 18
Lol
Vanshikap 24
is it bad that i don't see what's wrong with this? that sounds awesome OP! :)
skittyskatbrat 19
Quit shopping when you are hungry and start in the produce section FIRST.