Today, my girlfriend was packing for her study abroad program. Jokingly, I got her a pack of condoms. She laughed, saying "Oh yeah, I'll definitely need some of those." Later, I showed up to take her to the airport and saw her open suitcase in the kitchen, with the condoms on top. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, I got a package in the mail from my girlfriend. I was really excited until I realized that it was just a box full things that I gave to her. FML
Today, I got off work early to go home and surprise my girlfriend with lunch, only to come home to her in the middle of packing up all of her stuff. FML
Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML
Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML
Today, as I was crossing to the US, I got pulled over by border patrol for looking "suspicious". The female cop searched my purse and found a condom. She smirked and said, "I doubt you'd ever need that." FML
Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML
Today, I was helping my friend pack her carry on for her vacation. I drove her to the airport, and after her plane took off, I noticed I put my cell phone in her purse. Her vacation is 2 months long. FML
Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML
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Top comments
inkstains 0
#8: "there must be a reason for the abroad program" Yeah, women ONLY travel and go to school to get laid. Right. I'm sure there IS a reason, but it's likely that sex is not her main goal.
marris 0
If you can't take a joke, why'd you give her the condoms in the first place. Seriously, think about a suitcase - who would put condoms on top of their clothes and not in one of the pockets for little items.
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Comments (105)
Lou_Briccant 0
You set yourself up. Nothing more, nothing less.
ConSeannery 0
HAHAHAHHAHA. sorry. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
were_giraffe 2
Maybe the "joke" offended her too... many girls don't like jokes that insinuate they're loose. (and laughing at it doesn't always mean she really found it funny)
lwalters5 0
oh man, what can I say? you jus made it okay for her to have sex while she's away. =] way to go.
zKsPOWERHOUSE 0
Communication is key, you know. Talk to her ffs, don't come and be a pussy about it online. Also, if she wasn't playing a very bad joke on you then get out now.
Failercoptor 0
It would be nice if badtrip lrnd2internet and gave us a damn update.
HoodieGirl23 0
I hope you dumped her, and didn't take her to the airport
chitown_law 0
If your girlfriend is a student, did she leave her belongings at her parents' house before leaving to go abroad? If that is the case, there is a chance that she didn't want to leave a pack of condoms at the house for her parents to find.
Jillybeanx26 0
Why would you give her a pack of condoms, if she is going to study abroad? Do you really want her to cheat on you?? But after seeing her put them in her suitcase, I hope you dumped her.
cameron6i 0
this is why facebook was invented find a girl way hotter than your gf (hopefully your ex gf now) **** her post the photos online problem solved.