Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, my partner and I were cuddling on the couch, watching TV when she smiled and murmured, "You smell like my dad." FML
Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
I would totally do this to my boyfriend, but he would just laugh at me. The real FML begins when we find out you told her yes.
ImaginaryFoe 1
You do know that all human beings are covered with fine hairs, right? I don't understand why people are so grossed out by it. I'll admit I'm not a very hairy person but OP's reaction still bugs me. If your gf's facial hair is unsightly to you, tell her. She can take care of it or dump you. But bitching behind her back about how YL is F'ed is just a dick move on your part, OP.
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Comments (118)
LOL_Noobs 0
lol
dcam13 19
shes just getting ready for no shave november... whats the big deal?
marmlr339 14
Yuk!!! FYL!!!
rciccone 0
#14 ur hair is like snokie are u trying to jersey up?? haha ( I mean that in the least disrespectful way possible I love jersey shore)
zakkyzebra 11
16, too bad jersey shore is stupid
MissLizWolf 8
Yuck! Make her shave. Now. Before she gives people night terrors(:
rciccone 0
#29 i suppose that is your own opinion becauae i rather enjoy the show it is hilarious to' watch idiots fight and also to' watch stupid sammi kkep forgiving douche ronny is well i mean to' say im curious about that (GOD DAMN IT IM TRYING TO SAY I LIKE THE EFFIN SHOW) ps NeXT you Are gonna say you dont like hard times: of RJ burger??? PS i am not an MTV addict i just watch some shows
Fortuitous 0
#35, just step away from the keyboard, and don't assault the beauty of the English language anymore. I'd say you were assaulting it with a very deadly weapon. You have the right to remain silent...
rciccone 0
LOL #38
rciccone 0
after my really super bad horrible day u actually made me smile
KingDingALing 9
Rub your balls on her face and ask "Can you feel my pubic hair coming in?"
MadPercussion 0
WTF
iampunk 0
38 and 50 are winners.
sexybeastsexybea 0
I thought 56 said weiners
mrfruits 0
fat girl with beard sexy stuff
zem5 0
mmmm
skyttlz 32
Ew she sounds weird
tookietookie123 5
shmexy ;]
redbluegreen 41
I would totally do this to my boyfriend, but he would just laugh at me. The real FML begins when we find out you told her yes.
corporatescoundr 25
can I be weird and point out I love redbluegreen's pic
doopeyh 0
YDI for dating a warewolf
Stormblessed 0
Werewolf* It's what's on the inside that counts! :p
redbull33_fml 0
lol yeah
Wirebiter 0
It's a sign of fertility, bro.
Jewelofagal 2
It's a sign she has a higher level of testosterone in her system than non-bearded women.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Actually, it's the opposite.
skyttlz 32
It's the opposite. She has a lot of Testosterone. My bf's mom had that problem and it took her 7 years to have him
leilaostara 1
Hey skyttlz, do u like skittles per chance?xx
molil_4810 0
she's a silly troll literally! ( a quote by zdani ) :)
TheWhiteBunny 3
I hope the mods come after you soon.
smokeymcpottt 3
Tell her to get off the roids.
Mesocoollike 8
You made my day:)
ramboman19 8
oh lord...
SettoFail 9
WHY ARE YOU DATING HER? ... or him?
Daerauko 0
the "beard" means higher testosterone which means she's probably horny a lot more than most any other girl he know. he likes getting laid.
bman134 0
science ftw unless it really is a tranny
redbluegreen 41
Maybe because she has a sense of humor and there's more to her than her testosterone level? Would the deciding factor on dating someone really be as shallow and stupid as that?
ohSNAPyall 27
Maybe he likes her for her adam's apple.
AleyahRose123 6
UM... BECAUSE SHE OBVIOUSLY SOUNDS ADORABLE AND IF MY BF DID THAT TO ME I WAS JUST LAUGH AND KISS AND HIM AND HUG HIM AND TELL HIM HE'S PERFECT. I WOULD DO THE SAME IF IT WERE A GIRL
KlingonWarrior 0
So what's it like to kiss a wookie?
xX_LilSammie_Xx 4
LULZ
mikehaddad 0
ur such a ******* jerk. but still....
piepieburger 0
It's like hugging a warm, very fuzzy blanket.