Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, my partner and I were cuddling on the couch, watching TV when she smiled and murmured, "You smell like my dad." FML
Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
I would totally do this to my boyfriend, but he would just laugh at me. The real FML begins when we find out you told her yes.
ImaginaryFoe 1
You do know that all human beings are covered with fine hairs, right? I don't understand why people are so grossed out by it. I'll admit I'm not a very hairy person but OP's reaction still bugs me. If your gf's facial hair is unsightly to you, tell her. She can take care of it or dump you. But bitching behind her back about how YL is F'ed is just a dick move on your part, OP.
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Comments (118)
deadman93 8
that's kinda ****** up man...,
thisismeFMLing 0
maybe she's muslim
BrittneySaysFTW 0
Hmm..and the next time you guys are laying together in bed shes going to say, "Can you feel that? Its not the remote."
smileygirl1234 0
oh i just wanted to say you have nice smile and pretty eyes:)
duckiesrevenges 0
shemale?????
alyssydoll 0
she sounds MADD sexy lml gimme her I wanna bag!!
Hayllee 4
Hopefully she hasn't already shaved it, or she will have the most disgusting beard in a couple years. She should cream bleach or something, or she'll end up like my aunt.
ChelseaRaeS 7
Phineas and Ferb haha
piepieburger 0
And then you put her hands on your chest and exclaim, "Can you feel my boobs coming in?" Then you'd be even. :)
megaanlovesmusic 1
Bleckk .. i think it's timee to get a new gf unless u love her excentricness :)