Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML
Today, I had some hot phone sex with my long-distance girlfriend. Half-way through, my mom stormed in, and told me I was disgusting and sick for doing it in the same room as my brother. I forgot about the baby monitor. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw me on the couch as I walked in the door. I butt dialed my mom in the process. My girlfriend took off my pants and we got to business. After about 30 seconds of hearing what was going on, my mom thought something was wrong and called the cops to my apartment. FML
Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom, demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a goddamn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to "Listen to this voicemail." I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty, followed by the bed springs bouncing for three minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot in the bedroom. Her phone rang and she stopped to have an hour long conversation with her ex. FML
Today, I was having sex with a guy I met and in the middle of it his mother called him. After stopping to answer the phone, he tried to put me on with her because she didn't believe anyone would actually sleep with him. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend having phone sex less than 10 feet away from me. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. His mom called to him from the next room telling him dinner would be ready soon, he needed to move his car, etc. They had a 5 minute conversation...while he was still inside me. FML
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Top comments
sthrr 6
and she didn't feel the need to hang up? Ew..
crystal_james 0
The fact that your mom was listening to you have phone sex is pretty disturbing. But YDI for using the home phone...
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Comments (114)
bigredmonkeybutt 30
man your mom's a perv lol.
lationas 25
Maybe hot and perverted? :~p
djrox11 0
maybe, but I doubt it
CallMeHush 1
That is funny as hell. I'd wait till things got real hot and ask "are you kids going to be much longer?"
snowfox_fml 10
were u guys so good that ur mum felt compelled to listen or something?
mariazzz 5
she was probably impressed as sex with your dad is probably over in 3 minutes lmao
Gummybearjunkie 3
gross.
palltaru 0
YDI you perv you just had random phone sex with your BESTFRIEND?? What the hell wrong with you
Zebidee 9
With his GIRLFRIEND. ******* hell - are your eyes painted on?
Meaningless 1
Learn2Read, 22.
babelini 12
#22, lol!
andrealovvve 17
Your dumb.
ulicksam 0
"You're" - oh, the irony.
AubriS 0
#22 all you got out of that was that he is gross for having sex with his best friend which is incorrect to begin with, but didn't even think about the part where his mom disturbingly listened to her son having phone sex for over 13 minutes?! yeah him having phone sex ewww but mom listening in no big deal that's normal!! :-/
slimshady4ever 2
I hate it when I accidentally mark up comments -_-
RavenNight 0
dude thts um... wow tht sucks
xxmollyxx 25
You certainly do have a creepy mum, FYL.
aardvarkish 17
The mom's not creepy... she sounds hot...
randombitches1 0
ur mom is lucky that its phone sex and not real sex , at least with phone sex no 1 cant get pregnant or and std,but have u ever heard of a cellphone?????????? ..or i dont know maybe having phone sex when shes not in the house????????????