Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML
Today, I sent a cute, jokey text to my girlfriend saying, "Just in case the world ends, I love you." Not only did she dump me because I was an "idiot for believing in the doomsday", which I don't, she also wrote a Facebook status about it. Now everyone thinks I'm mentally unstable. FML
Carrier pigeon
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
It's for the best
Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend saying she needed more phone credit, so I bought her more and got another message saying "Great, now I have enough credit for this..." as she spelled out a three page message breaking up with me. Yes, I paid for her to break up with me via text. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML
Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Top comments
sammyf89 13
Who fake dumps someone? Who dumps over txt msg? Gah, there is something wrong with your girl.
sabrina1212 2
What did she say back? :(
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Comments (221)
MrWhiteGluz 1
Umadbro?
PenFifteen_fml 0
Well if you typed a long response, wouldn't she think you haven't read it so she added the just joking part.
1crabbygirl 10
I have sincerely never been more torn. I can't vote; she 'jokingly' breaks up and he instantly retaliates. Meet again later when you both grow up and learn not to say things you don't mean, perhaps?!
thisbitchlys 0
well thats when you say, babe i'm kidding too, you know i love all those things about you.
theonlysweetpea 10
Talk about immature. I didn't know you couldn't joke in a relationship! Let me destroy my sense of humor before I become Forever Alone! That said, that wasn't a funny joke so he should say something equally unfunny to see how she likes it but that petty bs he pulled showed he was no better than her if she was serious. Grow the hell up, the both of you! (
geminibby300 0
Dude that was a ****** joke. Sounds like she has insecurity issues and wants to keep you on her every move. That was a mean emotional thing of her to do. Well atleast she got a whole bunch of her own karma back!!
Stumblebum30 5
You both are to immature to even be in a relationship. Grow up and try again.
IsaiahG69 0
Thats not even coo. I would break up with her just for doing that.
RythmDancer 1
Oh mah gawd I would hate to be u when she finally got tht text
greenmen 12
Lol! She found someone else and not sure who is better. Girls do that natural selection.