Today, my Game of Thrones addicted girlfriend decided to name my penis Tyrion Lannister. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML
Today, my friend thought she would "save me some time" by spoiling Game of Thrones. FML
Today, I was so sad and lonely that I drunkenly masturbated to Game of Thrones scenes featuring Petyr Baelish. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for sneezing too many times during Game of Thrones. FML
Today, I found out the pet name my girlfriend gave my penis wasn't randomly made up after all; it's her ex's name. FML
Today, I got my giant Game of Thrones tattoo finished. Despite the fact that I had spelt it out for him, the artist wrote "You no nothing John Snow." It's the focal part of the tattoo. FML
Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML
Today, after some very passionate sex with my girlfriend, she exclaimed, "That was amazing Drew." She quickly tried to turn "Drew" into my actual name, which doesn't sound anything like Drew. FML
Today, my wife got bored and went into my collection of old PC games. She started playing Mass Effect and commented that she loved it and wanted to play all three. I don't know how to tell her that it ends worse than Game of Thrones. FML
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Top comments
PhilSnake22 13
Your penis is now a Lannister, one of the wealthiest penises in all the seven kingdoms.
JACKxRAWR 22
Well he IS the god of **** and wine.
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Comments (120)
hotbutthurttoast 13
Is this a fml?
cjwayy 22
Is that Peter Dinklage's character?
rosenkrieger223 24
Yes, the Imp. He's actually a pretty awesome character.
MisterEx 28
Excuse my ignorance for not knowing anything related to this topic, but as long as the GF is implying that OP's thingy is like "Peter" the "Imp" and not "Peter" the "limp", then it's all good.
cjwayy 22
Well geez people, I've never watched GOT.
dachayke 16
54, well now it's the Game of Bones.
odysseus6994 7
yes
Marley_000 14
You may have a short dick. But at least it is also handsome and charismatic.
thatssomia 12
atleast it sounds macho
viva_la_blondes 15
Why is her original comment downvoted? So she's not a fan, so what? Am I missing something?
Zestus 19
well given that he's a prick, its all just synonyms really
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I like Tyrion! Haha. I actually think he's a good person; he's got a sense of decency that most Lannisters don't have. :P (I'm not sure if you've read the books or not but that's where my opinion is coming from).
Joshwarrior 39
He is a kick ass character but I wonder if she named it based on the characters personality or size :P
Hiimhaileypotter 53
LOL, that's true. OP, does she call you her Giant of Lannister?
MRVOlivia 22
At least it's not Joffery. Nobody seems to like him besides me.
skyeyez9 25
He is the only normal Lannister out of the whole lot.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
Really, #40? I don't think anybody likes Joffrey. Not even Cersei likes Joffrey, and she's his mom.
DEATHSNIGHTMARE 16
*Spoiler Alert* He dies. :)
texaskitty86 25
*spoiler alert* practically everyone but tyrion dies. So hey! She's calling you a survivor at least! Of course she could also be implying you're short, ill tempered, and/or ugly, but we'll look on the bright side on this one.
paigexox0 37
Hey better than "baby carrot" or "chicken little"
rosenkrieger223 24
Haha. Indeed.
onlychildFTW 34
It's better then having a girl see it and say "awwe that things adorable" :/
octopussperm125 18
So at least im not the only one who named mine. I named mine jumbo, but i think "the dicktator" might be good too
CHUBBYninja 18
And is that the rough and tough guy? Or is it the guy that looks like he hasn't touched a bench press in his life? Cause I mean I would rather want the rough and tough guy then the wimp.
rosenkrieger223 24
It's neither. Tyrion is the dwarf.
MiataHarley07 6
Ahahahahahahahahahahaha. I love this. So much.
expectcriticism 13
ahahahaha there's a favorite button for a reason
DarthIronbat 5
ahahahahaha there are better ways to talk to people
JACKxRAWR 22
Well he IS the god of **** and wine.
southernsoul 3
Haha oh god. So much yes.
PhilSnake22 13
Your penis is now a Lannister, one of the wealthiest penises in all the seven kingdoms.
rosenkrieger223 24
I know right? I don't see the problem here. Haha
josiemorehouse 12
Better Tyrion than Walder Frey or Littlefinger!! :) Either a really old guy or a guy whose name sounds like a tiny pinkie!! Hehe!! A Lannister always pays his debts! Neither FYL or YDI, just awesomeness!!! Ha!!
Soulsbane96_fml 11
you do realize Tyrion is a dwarf, And therefore she's calling him small? It's not really all that awesome.
tygerarmy 35
She's not necessarily calling him small, if you've read the books there is another reason Shae calls him her "Giant of a Lannister." If she wanted to call him small she could call him Varys, Theon, or Littlefinger.
josiemorehouse 12
#26... Varys... Hahaha!! #19 - Never judge penis size based on height. Midgets may have small arms and legs, but they could be well endowed. :)
Soulsbane96_fml 11
I wasn't basing penis size on height, I was saying that she was comparing Tyrion, who is small in terms of height, and his dick, which I thought she was sauing was small in terms of size.
Crazynocatlady 22
^ Actually, Theon is known in the seven kingdoms for having a very large penis.
tygerarmy 35
Not anymore, he had a large penis.
Soulsbane96_fml 11
"His dick" meaning OP's, sorry. should've been more clear.
FMLcommenterer 13
'And as Tyrion Lannister ventured into the gasping dark cave of Kazmodan...'
patheticgirl101 3
LMAO this is great!