Anonymous
Southfield, United States
Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
ZAnon
Houston, United States
Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML
woofwoof
Izmir, Turkey
Unattack dog
Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML
Hey buddy
Who's a good boy?
Today, my dog celebrated my coming home by slapping me in the junk repeatedly with his tail. FML
anonamous
United States
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
Kelsiiii
Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo
Today, I pretended to be dead in front of my dog to see what he would do. He started to hump me, and when I tried to get up, he growled at me until I got back down on the ground to wait until he was finished. FML
-_-
United States
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I started petting my cousin's Doberman. Now, whenever I stop he growls menacingly. FML
Anonymous
Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
I Don't Exorcise
Shawnee, United States
Run for your life
Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML
anyonmus
Westminster, United States
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Top comments
irishpassion16 6
Sorry OP :/ my 100 pound Rottweiler would probably do the same, but lay down if it took too long, if that makes you feel better
annie_nk 23
Just because it's a German Shepherd doesn't mean it automatically knows to save you.
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Comments (133)
AnonCenturion 4
Get a Caucasian Shepherd, guaranteed to solve all of your protection issues.
Hime9908 22
You sure it's a dog sounds like a pussy to me
JustALesbian 16
Once I was just fake boxing with my friends and my roommates 25 pound dog tackled her.