Today, my fiancée told me about her new diet. Apparently, she is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so she can photosynthesise. She thinks this will help her lose weight, since she doesn't have to eat anything. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
lucas90 tells us more.
lucas90 2
Hey, I'm the OP! In all fairness, she and her friends were wasted, and I was the designated driver. She didn't remember any of this the next day, and actually found it quite funny. She's not dumb. Sorry to dissapoint you. And to the people that pointed out my typo - yes I'm MARRYING a her. English isn't my first language and I was exhausted when I wrote this. :)
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Top comments
RobinGoodfellow 47
Welp, she's gonna die. Although frankly, I have to say, you're the one who made her your fiancee. You're "dating a dumbass" and marrying one and that's your fault. Good luck.
cheeeksss 29
Diets are notorious for not working. Especially long term. If she wants to lose weight, motivate her to do outdoor activities daily. Even something as simple as walking around in a park. It helps if you two do it together. Although, the photosynthesis part made me laugh. Best of luck OP.
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Comments (138)
xsydneyx123 28
Dating a dumbass? You're engaged to a dumbass.,. You can't really fix dumb. Maybe she has a good heart.. Or.. Something. (:
Ashamed_Sister 60
It's not your fault that she is dumb but dating her is your fault.
Tarlachia 33
Considering the process of photosynthesis in its entirety as well as going along with her [preposterous] theory, she's going to effectively be expelling a LOT of carbon dioxide. Essentially, your fiancée is a major contributor to global warming. Inform her of such and see how she feels about the impending implications to Mother Earth.
salukins16 3
You obviously don't know how photosynthesis works...she would be taking in CO2, not expelling it. Plants release oxygen and take in carbon dioxide, so she would be helping the environment
Tarlachia 33
Durrr... You are correct. That sort of brain fart is what happens when one wakes up at 5am, has no coffee and is dealing with a screaming 2 year old child. In any case, that chick is downright stupid. Lol
Onyx3288 22
You deserve it! You're the one who chose to date her and now marry her dumb ass. In the time before you two were engaged, you didn't figure that out? If she thinks a person can photosynthesize I doubt this is the first time she proves this point to you...
moomimamoo 24
Correction: you're marrying a dumbass.
GingerRoot 13
Dating? You are engaged to a dumbass.
anthony99 14
Are you sure you're not dating Poison Ivy?
annarcheer 19
correction *your engaged to a dumbass.
martin8337 36
Photosyntesise? Is she a plant? The fungus is among us. The ficus don't like us.
ohSNAPyall 27
A fungus isn't a plant. It doesn't photosynthesize.
NomeDMF 17
There's actually a 10 water diet that's supposed to be really good for you. But this...it's a little off.