Today, my fiancée told me about her new diet. Apparently, she is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so she can photosynthesise. She thinks this will help her lose weight, since she doesn't have to eat anything. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
lucas90 tells us more.
lucas90 2
Hey, I'm the OP! In all fairness, she and her friends were wasted, and I was the designated driver. She didn't remember any of this the next day, and actually found it quite funny. She's not dumb. Sorry to dissapoint you. And to the people that pointed out my typo - yes I'm MARRYING a her. English isn't my first language and I was exhausted when I wrote this. :)
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Top comments
RobinGoodfellow 47
Welp, she's gonna die. Although frankly, I have to say, you're the one who made her your fiancee. You're "dating a dumbass" and marrying one and that's your fault. Good luck.
cheeeksss 29
Diets are notorious for not working. Especially long term. If she wants to lose weight, motivate her to do outdoor activities daily. Even something as simple as walking around in a park. It helps if you two do it together. Although, the photosynthesis part made me laugh. Best of luck OP.
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Comments (138)
skillz0811 4
Has she watched Knights of Sidonia on Netflix?
mimii00 10
Correction.. You're marrying a "dumbass".
tehdarkness 21
It's because of that stupid wannabe Barbie chick. She got a bunch of surgeries, looks completely alien, and claims to live off sunlight!
aliciabaird1269 11
I'm just going to come out and say it..... Some people shouldn't breed.
alex_jaguara 33
Natural selection will do its job, don't worry.
ZannityZan 13
I hope you explained to her that a) she isn't a plant, and b) all that's going to happen if she goes through with this is that she'll look unnaturally tanned.
Dean__Winchester 16
Unless she's Poison Ivy and is associated with plants that's the stupidest idea I've ever heard...
pere 11
You're also apparently dating a plant.
tinyprincess29 5
correction you are ENGAGED to a dumbass.
CandyApple88 13
you chose her. says more about you really.