Today, my fiancée told me about her new diet. Apparently, she is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so she can photosynthesise. She thinks this will help her lose weight, since she doesn't have to eat anything. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
lucas90 tells us more.
lucas90 2
Hey, I'm the OP! In all fairness, she and her friends were wasted, and I was the designated driver. She didn't remember any of this the next day, and actually found it quite funny. She's not dumb. Sorry to dissapoint you. And to the people that pointed out my typo - yes I'm MARRYING a her. English isn't my first language and I was exhausted when I wrote this. :)
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Top comments
RobinGoodfellow 47
Welp, she's gonna die. Although frankly, I have to say, you're the one who made her your fiancee. You're "dating a dumbass" and marrying one and that's your fault. Good luck.
cheeeksss 29
Diets are notorious for not working. Especially long term. If she wants to lose weight, motivate her to do outdoor activities daily. Even something as simple as walking around in a park. It helps if you two do it together. Although, the photosynthesis part made me laugh. Best of luck OP.
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Comments (138)
spicyclubsauce 13
Instead of being an asshole & posting about it on here, maybe you should try to help her. I just love how guys think marrying stick figure women is going to get them somewhere in life lol good luck dumb ass
sandrisima 13
Apparently she thinks she is a plant
tanner6426 5
More like your marrying a dumbass
clickme 17
Sounds like the perfect girl to me!
ELoni_fml 25
Please do not procreate with her
pandalover69 26
Never marry someone because they're pretty. End it now before you regret it later. How did you not know she was this stupid when you proposed?!
SMHsohard 22
She's either a dumbass or a fern.
BeachGirl27 23
Please marry someone else so the gene pool won't get polluted! We can only hope she was joking (dear God I hope so!)?
Jaevwyn 17
Has she turned green, spent a lot of time in some soil and have big hands that point up towards the sun? She does? Ok she's a plant
Taurus_ChicKa 37
No, you're ENGAGED to a dumbass. Shouldn't you have known the limits of her intelligence before proposing? And please, for the sake of all humanity, don't procreate with her, because stupid breeds stupid. Use a condom.