Today, my fiancée texts me while out at a restaurant. She told me that she saw one of my high school friends there, and that he asked "How's Douglas doing?". She then asked me who Douglas is. Douglas is my legal name. We've been together for over three years and she didn't know. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
Today, I've been seeing this girl for three months. After asking her if she'd like to go out to eat with me, I realized that she never called me by my name, just "hey you". While we were out, I wondered what she had me saved as, so I texted her when she got up to use the restroom. It was "free food". FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, my boyfriend was introducing me to some business partners. As he was going along telling me their names, when he introduced me, he called me by my best friend's name. FML
Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of four months. FML
Today, my fiancée’s siblings kept calling me by her ex-boyfriend’s name. FML
Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML
Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML
Today, I was introduced to the girl my current boyfriend went out with while dating me. FML
Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML
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Top comments
Miss_Jeannie 0
If she's been calling you "Doug" for short and didn't realize that your full name was Douglas, she's an idiot. If you were being called by some other name completely and never told her your real name was Douglas, YDI.
fatman1970 25
Why the hell haven't you told her your real name?
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Comments (71)
maverick1031 0
Some people like to use their middle name or second name as the "common" name. I know a few people that do that. Specifically in some cultures, the first name for some reason is the same among everyone of the same sex in the family, to differentiate, they use the second name. That could be the case here.
St0rm11 0
#29 I love you. This WINS X10000
SusanaSaysRawrxD 0
Doug reference? I ******* love you. xD
containsnosoy 0
...and you're getting married?
failuristic 3
This reminded one me of Seinfeld for some reason... MULVA???
lo1337a 1
COSMO?!
vampirebetsy 0
I knew my husband for over 10 years before we started dating. He uses his middle name, not his first. We were dating a year before I knew his legal first name was not the one everyone called him. It wasn't until we were at a doctor's office together and the nurse called him in. I was confused when he went in as she hadn't called his name (the one I knew him by). We had a talk afterwards. It can happen :)
containsnosoy 0
Obviously it happens, but after three years? There's a communication lag there.
Thalymor 0
I don't know. I mean, I just found out my cousin's real name last year (he's 13 and six years younger than me). I remember his baby shower and we have always, always, ALWAYS referred to him as Hank, not John Henry which is his "legal" name. He's also named after his grandfather---Who my mother has always called Uncle Hank. I have plenty of friends who go by middle names, and I'd get really confused if someone came up to me and said "Hey, how's Tommy?" when I know the person as Marcus. So, honestly, I can believe it especially if OP goes by a middle name or something. If he goes by Doug, the girl is sort of in idiot or may have just been confused because he probably doesn't get called Douglas a lot especially by friends. Who goes by Douglas in high school anyways?
skybeau 0
Not really. I was 17 years old when I learned that my mother's 'real' name was Claire (she also goes by her middle name). Her driver's license and all her bank accounts aren't in her 'real' name either. She grew up in a small town where everyone knew her by her middle name, so it came time to get her license or open a bank account, they opened it in what they thought to be her name. Everyone knows her as Felicity and if ANYONE referred to her as Claire, I wouldn't have a clue who they were talking about. It's even more confusing because every legal document she has as proof of ID has Felicity as her first name rather than middle name. Even though I doubt that OP's documents are all under some other name (unless OP had a similar upbringing to my mother), if someone introduces themselves to you with one name and everyone who knows them refers to them by that name, are you really going to check their ID to be sure of who they are?
birds_fml 7
How does this even happen? My husband goes by his middle name. I knew his first name before we even started dating. It's the standard question, after you find out their first and last name, you ask what their middle name is. My husband replied that it was the name I knew him by. I'm not stupid, so I asked him what his first name was, and he told me. Isn't exchanging middle names part of the early "getting to know one another" process, so wouldn't she find out what your first name was if you go by your middle name?
gingersnapper 0
YDI for using a pseudonym! Stop trying to hide your identity, OP.
allmidnighteyes 11
YDI for telling her your name was Quailman.
Danzergirl1 0
Well asshole. Why didnt you oh idk.., TELL her ur real name???
cutie467 0
did u tell her it was ur legill name??
ilmlsm 0
Umm YDI for not telling her