Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my dog to the dog park and let him off the leash for a bit. He ran straight towards a group of people having a picnic, jumped on their blanket, and devoured half of their food before I could catch him. They were surprisingly forgiving, but I had to buy them lunch to make up for it. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park, and he ran straight into a group of people having a picnic. Naturally, he grabbed the biggest piece of meat in sight and ran off with it. As I chased him, I tripped and fell in front of everyone. My dog then sat and chewed the meat in front of me. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. He ran straight into a muddy pond, came back to shake himself off, and got mud all over my freshly cleaned white hoodie. A stranger passing by gave us a thumbs up and said, “Good boy!” I'm not sure who he was talking to. FML
Today, while walking my dog, I saw a hot guy so I tried to look chill. My dog chose that exact moment to take an enormous dump. I didn’t have any bags. The dude stared while I pretended to check my phone until he walked off. FML
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
Today, in the middle of what I thought was an empty park, I told my dog he’s the “goodest, bestest boy” while out on a walk. A stranger appeared out of nowhere, gave me a thumbs-up, and said, “You too, champ.” FML
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
Today, for the third time, my boyfriend called his dog by my name. FML
Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML
Today, I took my dog to the puppy park to meet girls. I met one very attractive girl, she loved my puppy, and she asked for my number. As she took out her phone, my dog defecated on her feet. She was wearing sandals. FML
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Top comments
MisterDoctor 12
Looks like someone went to the closet and.. *puts on sunglasses*.. let the dogs out.
xy798 8
Your dog came out to you. In the park. In front of other people. Sounds wonderful.
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Comments (113)
DivineSunshine 1
Was your dog on top?
katie1989 9
I hate when people allow their dogs to hump others. If another dog goes to hump mine he'll growl. If they continue he'll grab them by the neck and shake them. He HATES being dominated by strange dogs, its rude dog behaviour.
LLCoyote 1
In the words of The Lonely Island and Lady Gaga, "It's ok, when it's in a three way"
Jenny143_fml 4
hilarious xD
emuexport 4
It's Sparky the gay southpark dog !!!
magnetic_aura 26
Haha, my dog used to do that. He humped both male and female dogs (mostly males), but he only got "really excited" for the boys. I ended up apologizing to a lot of dog owners who had to wash their sticky dogs off after mine was done with them...
LyricaSilvan 30
I love how half the comments on this one are just people trying way too hard to make "dog" puns.
Sheepiebeepie 26
Are you that insecure in your sexuality that you can't handle your dog being a little gay?