Today, my dad walked in on me jerking off. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t Skyping my boyfriend, while both of us were totally naked. I had just told him to “put those toes in your mouth and I’ll cum like you’ve never seen before”. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad walked in on me jacking off. He swore and told me to lock my door next time. Later on I heard him snickering and telling my mom that I "jack off real weird." FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh, I had an itch…" FML
Today, I was giving a strip tease over Skype to my boyfriend. My mom walked in mid-way through, took a long look at me, said hi to my boyfriend, and walked out. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were using our Skype accounts for the first time. He went to the restroom and I thought that I'd surprise him with my clothes off for when he came back. I heard him walk back into the room so I got into position. It wasn't him. It was his mom. FML
Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML
Today, my dad unlocked the bathroom door and barged in without warning only to catch me, with no clothes on, masturbating. He said, "sorry" but stayed for another 20 seconds to look for his shampoo. FML
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML
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Top comments
Dave_Davington 34
If it's any consolation, he's if anything even more scarred by the whole situation than you are.
sadCowboysfan 20
That must have been awful for all of you. Now that it’s happened, I guess you’ll be more on your toes to stop it from happening again
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Comments (36)
RichardPencil 32
And he yelled, “You’re ripping off MY move! Why do you think Mom gets four pedicures a week?!?!”
Dave_Davington 34
If it's any consolation, he's if anything even more scarred by the whole situation than you are.
BlueSteele220 31
did you finish? it would be worse to be given a pearl necklace by your son..
David Horgan 8
While looking dead in the eyes of his father.
azouwa 26
The sat part is.... I can relate. my mom once walked in on me and a bf skyping. FML/FYL
Rhonda Edgar 2
thats horrible. Thank you for your service!
Cali 57
What service? Jacking off on Skype?
manb91uk 22
This is without a doubt the funniest, cringiest thing I’ve read in weeks! I love it!
AdeenCuffing 12
Oh my god.
sadCowboysfan 20
That must have been awful for all of you. Now that it’s happened, I guess you’ll be more on your toes to stop it from happening again
David Horgan 8
Funny you mentioned feet. I have a feeling you like them...
Lobby_Bee 18
F your dad's life for having seen that.
Nic1330 5
I have nothing against gay people but I feel like this was between 2 guys
Kink Rat// ITS FUCKING OUT OF MY GOD 5
no shit
d34d4lus 6
I don't think chicks refer to themselves masturbating as jerking off anyway
Rabite 28
What does this sentence even mean?