Today, my dad's girlfriend threw me a birthday party and all the gifts, decorations, and the cake were according to my age, which they thought was 12. I turned 13 today. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
Today, it was both my and my stepmother's birthday. In preparation, my dad bought a huge banner with my stepmother's name on it, and a lovely birthday cake. When I told him it was also my birthday, he just grunted and taped a post-it note to the banner with my name on it. Same with the cake. FML
Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My mom got me a gym membership and a bunch of clothes that are a few sizes too small. FML
Today, my family threw me a surprise party for my 29th Birthday. My brother-in-law sent me a text telling me they were all waiting for me to arrive. Thinking it was at my sister's home, I drove two hours there. It was actually at my parents' house. I missed my party and they ate my cake. FML
Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My dad showed up to my birthday dinner wasted, was loud and obnoxious the whole time, sexually harassed our waitress, then invited my annoying, bratty nephews to come home and spend the night with us. They're sleeping in my room. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML
Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML
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Top comments
IllegalLight 0
If your dad's girlfriend is like 35 or whatever.. get her a 40 year old balloon on her next birthday :P She won't be happy either.
Kylias 6
Aww, that sucks. Congrats and happy birthday! And congratulations on being 13 and typing more coherently than most of the older crowd.
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Comments (412)
Lightz_Camera_Me 0
I hate people who whin over little things your turning 13 stop actin like a baby suck it up and move on. Besides the only important birthdays are your 1-5 birthdays, 10th, 15th, 16th, 18th and 21st
myballs 0
Get the **** off of the internet, you ******* ****. You're 13. Your ******* balls haven't even dropped yet.
The_Disturbed 5
I'm presuming you didn't notice that the OP is a GIRL. She doesn't have any balls to drop. Idiot. And TO the OP...I'd say FYL because your 13th is a big date, but trust me, there are more important things. I didn't celebrate my 18th. The wonders of fostercare for you. I'd just been dumped by the person I'd been with for 15months and my cat had just been run over. There're much worse things that can happen to you other than someone getting your age wrong.
QWERTYCommander 5
Excuse me, my balls dropped when I was 12.
HarroIAmBob 21
Could you try giving us a chance? We aren't the little dumbfucks you perceive us to be. And 13 is a fine age to be on the internet, we aren't 6 years old.
babyblu72 0
wow thats nothing do you remember the last time i had a party? yeah neither can i. SO STOP YOUR BITCHING AND SUCK IT UP YOU UNGRATEFUL ****
iDrea 0
I'm 12, turning 13 in a few days, I mainly go on this site because I just love reading it. Just a nice site to go onto if you want a few laughs to remember later in the day or if you've already had a bad one. @ OP: Just be grateful they remembered and went through the effort.
repyourcliche 0
Oh for ****'s sake. That comment made me want to die. It was just so pathetic. Jesus christ. Either acquire the mindset of an adult or shut the **** up. I'm also aware that yes, my comment was very immature and that I should not tell others to be more mature when I can't even string together a sentence without profanities... bla bla bla... cursing is not the way to express myself... bla bla bla... but sometimes telling someone to be quiet is just not the same.
KarelessKitten 0
i beg the question...why are there 13 year olds on this site? FML is a bit mature in nature. As to the post, big f*cking deal. I had b-day parties growing up and I wish I hadn't. Parties should be held for accomplishments. Celebrating the fact that once again you're a year older? I know I have a weird way of looking at it but that's just me. I think most holidays are crap too. I have a fiance that feels the same way though. I understand that most people like b-day parties. At least your father's gf remembered. Teenagers nowadays are bratty little f*ckwits. You prove me right.
iheart 0
awwww ur 13!!! so cute. happy birthday!
hXcsoccerplaya 0
shoo, at least you got a party. besides, your parents thinking your older than you are has it's advantages...
zee209 0
I never had a birthday party, and I'm 22. You got an awesome party and complain because they got a year wrong? Age doesn't really matter until you're 16/18/21 anyway...Stop whining so much. And OP, you're 13, get off this site because you whine about stupid childish things... This is why I hate most teenagers..
onealhart54 0
As surprising as this may be, I am also thirteen and I am all for the good of this website. I don't post bogus stories because it is "fun". I will only comment on select topics. If a thirteen year old is mature enough, he/she should be able to use almost any website. Plus, there are twenty year olds on this sit that are less mature than I.
KarelessKitten 0
Um..doesn't FML prompt you when setting up your profile as to old you are? I'm pretty sure you are supposed to be 18 years old and up to read FML content. although, im not 100 % sure.