Today, my dad insisted on having a family movie night. He chose the movies Jaws and Mayday. I'm going on a diving expedition tomorrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw my dad sitting in the car alone, blaring classical music, blowing up beach balls. FML
Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I writhed in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet, that I'm embarrassing him. He also mentioned that jellyfish were out today and that I should be careful. Thanks, dad. FML
Today, my dad vehemently refused to let me go on vacation to France with my best friend, because he watched Taken a few months ago and apparently forgot that it's just a movie. FML
Today, I went on a movie date with a guy. He brought his mom. FML
Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me screaming, "My precious!" FML
Today, I arrived for the two-week scuba diving vacation I spent months saving, planning, and looking forward to. Today, I also developed an ear infection and can't scuba dive for 2 weeks. FML
Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML
Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to go fishing together, but he said he was busy with errands. Later, in a casual conversation with my friend, she opened up her phone to show me pictures of her fishing with my dad. FML
Today, my dad thought it would be OK to make sound effects for everything he did, in a public park, with me tagging along behind. FML
Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML
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Top comments
DaniPandi 22
That bites. But, hey, have fun on the dive!
IdontWanna69 8
As long as you're not on your period you should be fine!
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Comments (146)
rattusrattus 19
If you are attacked, throw your air tank into the shark's mouth, then shoot the tank from a safe distance. Shark go boom!
TheNinjaBacon 8
Those r'nt the worst movies he could have shown u think about how it would be 2 show the happy tree friends to a 2 y old (if u dont no the happy tree friends look them up on u tube)
mockingjay_fml 0
Jaws isn't that scary anyways. And whoever you're going with wouldn't take you to a part of the ocean where there are known to be a lot of sharks lurking around.
Tritribaby 0
Not unless they hated the person ....murder without the jailtime(;
bizarre_ftw 22
Jaws is the saddest, most pathetic representation of great whites (don't get me wrong, it's a good movie, but don't for the life of you take it for fact). For one thing, they almost Never attack humans, but when they do it's often just a "hmm, what is this?" bite, and 90% of the time it's a bodyboarder because the board and the arms and legs hanging over the side resemble a seal body, and testing bites are almost never fatal, and it's unlikely for them to come back.
bizarre_ftw 22
Look at it this way, can you taste the difference between shrimp and chicken? Fish and beef? So can they. They don't Want to eat us, and 99.9% of the time they won't. Also, if you're going on a diving trip and you're afraid you likely aren't That experienced, therefore you'll likely be in relatively shallow waters, and great whites are Huge, therefore you have a better chance of meeting the little mermaid than a great white in roughly shallow waters, you should be fine in and around a coral reef or something of the like. If you meet Any sharks they'll most likely be reef sharks or basking sharks, and they're not computer programmed killers, they're creatures. They aren't always looking to eat, and as far as signs to look out for, a good rule of thumb is a more or less straight, relaxed body, and roughly level fins is okay, an arched back and lowered fins means you've made the shark uncomfortable, likely by entering their territory, just move away.
bizarre_ftw 22
There are other creatures in the sea, if sharks killed like nuclear bombs do you think that would be possible? Also, back on jaws, the shark was a grossly over exaggerated size that was impossibly fast, not remotely possible. Basically you'll be fine, just stick with your guide and enjoy the beauty and wonder of the ocean
German_Tech 2
I would stay on the boat if I were you.
calaribinix 5
Ouch
hateevryone 15
im sure he didn't do it to be malicious.
soulmancam 6
Think about it like this, Shark attacks are rarer than lightning hitting a person! You will be fine, keep in mind both those movies are science fiction.
russianraccoon 0
Take the hint ;)
dapoet83 0
Lol that's funny