Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML
Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML
Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I went. I returned with another pair for him to try on, found him bent over and blurted out, "What's with the terrible underwear?" I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML
Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year-old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year-old woman, to tears. FML
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
Today, I thought a cute guy was checking out my ass, so I cheekily bent over a little to give him an eyeful. He walked over to a shop assistant, pointed at me and left. The assistant then informed me, “Miss, you’ve torn your trousers, your knickers are visible, and, um, apparently you have a skid mark.” FML
Today, while shopping for dresses, I found a really cute one that fit me really well, but not at all in the breast area. My grandma screamed "buy her some titties!" Everyone in the store looked at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML
Today, I was walking through the streets with my best friend, feeling confident in my new skinny jeans. My friend said, "you really should be wearing a thong with those pants, your underwear line is showing". I was wearing a thong, those lines were just my fat rolls. FML
Today, I was giving a talk in class, when halfway through someone pointed out that my pubes were sticking out my trousers. FML
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Top comments
WiseGuy79 14
So I'm guessing they don't call those lil waist pouches "fanny packs" in the UK lol
carleigh2424 0
Hahahhaaaaa!:)
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Comments (308)
carleigh2424 0
Hahahhaaaaa!:)
nastenka_fml 0
tons of uk-related fmls todaaay:)
seanders 10
I knew all Europeans like take it in the fanny!
H8rSk8r 0
I'd 'ave to say, that's bloody brilliant!
bigbadtim 7
LOL 17.
Mauskau 36
see Americans are fail
moofin123456 0
You're American.
DarkHelmet 10
LOL Well bollocks on her then... or is it dogs bollocks
coolsteve 0
Haha I always wondered why they say fanny in American shows, I always thought they were talking about vaginas until I realised it meant the rear.
BoyFromTheFuture 0
ops cousin knew but she has a huge fanny.
MrFerret 0
I bet they were all envious of her giant ******.
vballer123456 0
that's funny poor fanny it's never gonna be viewed the same
Rwstudent1 0
Ahaha lol
coolsteve 0
Hence the term "fanny fart." Queefing ftw!
Y_U_19029 0
89, that goes with your pic
anthaz_fml 0
My sister's nickname is fanny. Hehehehe...
omfgrofl1337 0
TBH, OP, considering Americans, im going to have to say she knew EXACTLY what a fanny was..
ChubbyCake 5
This FML made my day. I like fanny packs. Yes, I also mean ****** in packs lol.
rapeter 0
I've never heard ONE American ever say fanny..unless they're realy old
Thunderbender 2
Damn where do I start. 1. YDI for not being American 2. That's just funny, you're life is not ****** in anyway, move along.
hockeyplayer82 0
28- I'd like to know how that makes American failures.
Sprinkle_Donuts 1
Haha omg too funny ur cousin rocks you should have went along with it nd said me either. screw all the people stareing they needa mind there business.
Dimitrov_fml 0
Because they have huge vaginas.
ThatLooksSticky 16
i agree with #1 - haaahahahahahaaa!!
Theblue_fml 0
I'm American and I didn't even know the word fanny meant rear. I guess we are fails
plasmix1 0
where the sun don't shine.
tweetbaby14 18
no 145 we aren't fails. think about it how many of us Americans say fanny? I don't know of any that aren't ancient, or just trying to imitate the British people seen on tv. OP she probably knew what it meant and just wanted to embarrass you. how would this be your FML though? they just stared. it's not really one for your cousin either. it's funny, get a sense of humor and laugh a little.
ZleveL 0
28 stfu British anti-American. -______-
TokyoKid47 3
then what about fanny packs? are they ****** packs in the UK?
SqueakyPanther 0
hahahahaha!!!!!! oh that is so bad!!! lol.
ImaBmyLonurTees 0
what American uses the word "fanny" anyway??
ugwmii 0
Wiedergabe des Regenbogens, der Geschmack des Regenbogens
Mauskau 36
191 I will not :p all the Americans I know are dumb lol.
mrahhhhh 21
#28 No they're not, we just talk different. You talk different compared to us too. It's not like people have the time to learn every damn word in another dialect of their language. If you don't believe me get your ass to America and ask for a fag when you want a cigarette. The people laughing should set you straight. Hopefully they'll throw stuff at you too.
hockeyplayer82 0
231-And apparently all of the British people I know are dumb
dollface19 0
In the UK they're called bum bags...
smellymellyy 7
in the uk we call fanny packs "bum bags" :). bum is a word we use in the uk equivalent to the american "butt" :D.
HelloNoora1 0
28 she's not from there and had no idea what it meant
anonymous100000 17
I would recommend getting a new group of friends then. however; generally, people who hang out with each other have the same personality/trait/hobby etc. so calling everyone you know dumb...
kobebryant100 5
1st whats up fanny.
xXpeachesXx 0
it's funny because you're not first. lol
ShowStopper68 0
do you wanna go to jail she's twelve
UpYoursInAdvance 0
90 age ain't nothin but a number, nd NO 2 ONCE again the 2nd or 3rd person always FAILs!
6969awesome 0
hey 98 I like your location
PincheEdgarr 0
lol that's funny!:D I knew that though cause I'm from UK xD
z620 0
you look rather scary^ and what do they call a ******?
Kaelibean 0
You're British ?!(;
cellycrunk 16
your cute :) @#4
RachelBerry_fml 5
omg british?! and Op in america its pussy ;)
CathyCraaazy 8
#4 you're British? :D
tandem123 6
You're British?!?! No way! I'm an american boy you're never going to meet, just like these girls.
bamxitsxandreaa 8
haha ^^ I like how everyone is asking if you're British, obviously...he just said that! -___- smh.
bamxitsxandreaa 8
haha ^^ @ #4 I like how everyone is asking if you're British, obviously..he just said that! -___- smh.
sydney184829 0
no you guys check his profile he's from Nevada. that's a state. as in the united states.
f_my_flip_life 5
It just says Town/Country is Nevada. Which would mean that he lives in Nevada now, not that he's from there. He just said he's from the UK. -___-
fleckney26 25
Why do you yanks get so excited when you find out that someone is british? It's not like we're celebrities, or do you view us like that?....
thebestofboth 20
It's just the crazy ones
machiko_fml 0
ahaha. this made my day.
Frenchtony 17
cute
sammywhits 0
has anyone heard if fanny bridge in Tahoe? hahahahahahahaha
annanonomus 0
Hahaha! That's so funny!
indi80 0
8 are u Asian
Wandering_Witch 0
That's pretty funny.... I didn't know that any of our words met different things... UsvsUk
Sun_Kissed18 25
Rubber, condom vs eraser
BoCo_fml 9
khaki= a type of pants or dog poo??
sourgirl101 29
Fags means cigarettes in the UK.
RedPillSucks 33
fag cigarette vs ****
RedPillSucks 33
Not quite sure how this broke the rules. Explaining what another word for cigarettes are in the UK?
Elfkid21 19
The ignorance is strong in this one... -_-' (#9)
Elfkid21 19
if you used the fa (I'm sure you could "G"uess the last letter.) that's probably what did it. (please no one report this. I wasn't being mean or anything, just helping the guy above me out.)
praayforplagues 0
I haven't laughed this hard at an FML in a while, ahahaha.
SillySister 0
Ha ha, that made me laugh.
nerdsgetmehot 23
That's awesome. I'd be pretty embarrassed if that happened, but I'd be more amused than anything.
Jennifra 0
hehe you've tried to post 72 fmls and none were accepted :(
nerdsgetmehot 23
#152 One was, but then it was deleted. And not all of the 72 were different ones, it was mostly just different wordings of the same few...
Spastastic 6
If you had actually had 72 genuine fml moments in your life good enough to submit, I would feel very bad for you. By the way, is there anything you'd prefer to be called other than nerds, which is what I see most people call you? It feels strange to me somehow...
nerdsgetmehot 23
#175 I know, right? That would be awful. I secretly like to think that the fact that I haven't had any published (besides the one that got deleted) is just a sign that my life is pretty okay and I shouldn't worry too much. You can call me Katie! That's my real name. :P It does seem strange to have everyone calling me either "Nerd" or "Nerds"! Haha.
lostinmymind121 0
you say it like being called nerds is a bad thing :)
nerdsgetmehot 23
#227 Not at all. I'm a nerd and proud of it.
bombtastic 10
damnnn. this is why you talk to them about the word difference before she went out there. but still. I would've laughed either way, cause I hardly ever hear the word fanny anymore anyways. haha.