Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML
Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML
What?
Today, my coworker got a raise by making our boss give me a pay cut for doing his job while he was slacking off. As we were heading home for the day, he found $100. FML
Drunken antics
Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML
Cash
Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML
Seize the means of production
Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML
Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML
All in a day's work
Today, at my job as a waiter I sharted myself while taking an order. They tipped me $20 and wrote "for new underwear" on the receipt. FML
The customer is sometimes devious
Today, I found out that I accidentally returned a customer her $147 check she had written out to pay for her groceries and receive cash back. The lady got free groceries and money, and I'm now losing my job. FML
I'm so tired
Today, after two weeks of living on plain pasta, I finally got my paycheck and was excited that I'd get real food, and ride the subway instead of exhausting my malnourished body with the two-hour walk to work. My surname was misspelt on the check; the bank is holding it for ten days. FML
Top comments
Idonebeenhad 17
How'd it taste?
mattmadden 0
A brain...
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Comments (192)
dondomom 0
What does OP mean? :S
k8izgr8_fml 0
what a waste of a first comment. and now a second
imosim 0
op liked it
Idonebeenhad 17
How'd it taste?
CountryGirl111 7
lmao thats great
whiteboy7thst 2
The nonexistent sperm
NiqueKristan92 0
Jizzerrific !
abbi96x 0
Nice.
Trupe 3
Well he didn't put that for no reason ;)
cyns0_oaSailor 0
if you had wells Fargo it wouldn't be a problem, they have ATMs you can deposit your check through.
baseball6917 8
definitely a win in his part
nevergo 10
OP sounds so uncumfortable
DaslovesTrack 2
this is the best fml ever
USMC_FTW 3
anyone else notice OP has a guy's name?
Mrrevorp 0
^^ yes I noticed haha I triple checked
BossDavyy 0
It tasted crummy
Nitial 6
Maybe OP is a guy. Maybe it was a joke.
abbi96x 0
Wishful thinking maybe?;)
ahhhFYL 0
............................cool story bro.
Babygirrrrl 0
that's what I'm wondering
AnotherRandomPer 0
It tasted like victory?
ghostychi 9
well the swallowing must have been worth the money to get a check for it.
pman590 8
you fined him for swallowing... or am I missing something?
airs_01 3
you're definitely missing something.
mattmadden 0
A brain...
soccerchickrocks 0
Hahahaha niceee!
Ghostkiller12345 9
LOL word of the day is PWN
BossDavyy 0
No I thought it was boobies
GreenMuzz 0
go back to sleep
Babushka_Homyak 10
Haha, your co-worker ha a saucy sense of humor.
starryxeyes 2
ql
starryxeyes 2
ql
felipe87 2
I wrote sexual favors on a check I gave my room mate for rent.
Porschephile 0
First few comments always get several replies
iownyou777 0
but the stupid comments get none
smartloser 0
you just gave him one
SmallyBigs 9
you gave him another.
ChickenInMyKitch 4
he'll, let's all give him one
ChickenInMyKitch 4
Hell*
Miss_Kristen 10
I think it's weird how many people care what other people think. Just saying :)
amanda_d95 9
I agree
DaM_iM_sO_nY 2
Dam you look good ..... random
MurphyS94 4
Oh please, like you don't. If you didn't care what people thought, you wouldn't do a LOT of things that make you what is considered to be 'socially acceptable'. Everyone cares, get off your high horse.
gtwerd 0
And from left field... some High school kid?
DaM_iM_sO_nY 2
yea real creepy I told a person they looked good .... guess nobody complements you wonder why
sovietkiwi 0
go cut yourself
hollylollyxoxo 0
78- are you a chick or a dude?
hiyourcute 0
I think it's pretty obvious shes a girl, and if you really can't tell all you need to do is click her profile. No need to ask that, it's kind of offensive...
a_nutritionist 10
@78 its beyond clear that you are a teenager. as an adult most people really couldnt care less what is said in the memo section of a cheque theyre cashing. so long as its not something that can get you in legal issues why care? its obviously a joke and anyone who doesnt realise that isnt someone whos opinion youd care about anyway.
brettj69 0
seriously miss Kristen just by reading your comment I can tell you're just some annoying high school girl so just stfu
BeastNerd 3
Hey, a_nutritionist, stop bullshitting everyone and yourself. Don't be hypocritical - you don't even have a profile picture.
lakeybalboa 0
102- are you a whale or a human?
a_nutritionist 10
@124 that comment fails on every level. at no point did i mention a photo, so how does that make me a hypocrite you daft twat?
xxlauruh 0
nutritionist - I read your comments in an australian accent.
xxlauruh 0
and also, I think everyone cares what people think on some level. perhaps not to the caliber of really giving a crap about what's on a check though.
kay2kay 1
@146 I don't think you were elected to speak for everyone. Unlike you, some people really don't care about what others say about them.
YacL 15
Everyone cares about what other people think of them. Some more than others, and some are not willing to admit to it, but everyone cares about their image, even if it's just a little bit.
startrekker 3
hey nutritionist, my sis and I are adults and we constantly put random comments like that in the memo section whenever we write checks to each other. you know why? cause it's ******* funny.
MurphyS94 4
114, what does my age have to do with it? Throughout the 17 years of my life, i've known enough people (teenagers, adults, etc.) to know that everyone cares what others think of them. It's those adults that say "teenagers have no idea what they're talking about" that are the most immature. Accept the fact that I have a brain and can form my own logical opinions and get over yourself.
wdcthree 0
When someone says "just saying", it's makes me feel like they are uneducated. Speaking of uneducated, it's spelled realize* and please learn how to use a comma a_nutritionist. Losing arguments to teenagers is unbecoming of you by the way.
a_nutritionist 10
@172 i hope that was just an anecdotal story since i clearly stated that i dont see any reason to care about a comment in a cheque memo...so, yeah thanks for that? @173 i hate arguing with teenagers, but i cant let this one go. firstly, that quote you so eloquently misused is not mine. i said it was clear from your comment that you are a teenager which has a completely different meaning - one your underdeveloped mind is yet to grasp. it means, because teenagers are at a time when they are easily influenced by anything that affects their personal image, theyre likely to find something like this to be a problem, whereas an adult without such issues wouldnt care - because its a joke in the memo of a ******* cheque. try working on your comprehension skills and argue a point im actually making rather than just throwing some random bullshit out there and hope it sticks. @175 speaking of uneducated, its called british english. its more widely used than your americanised version, and yet somehow you fail to recognise it. cant wait for your next typo list, wise ass.
MurphyS94 4
"one your undeveloped mind is yet to grasp". There, now I've properly captured the stupidity of your comments. You, sir, are quite clearly set on your belief that teenagers are too immature, impressionable, etc. to understand anything. If there's anything worse then adults with that mindset, it's stubborn adults with that mindset. The only reason you "can't let this one go" is because you're afraid of being bested by a teenager. Get over it because your comments are just huge generalizations of what you think all teenagers are like, and even I know that huge generalizations are not a proper basis to start a debate with. Anyways, since you're too stubborn to see reason and I'm annoyed by your comments, I'm out of here. Or, as all of us teenagers say, TTYL DUDE.
a_nutritionist 10
hey pot, havent seen your black ass in ages. im not debating the point further, youre repeating nonsense as though its a valid argument, and i honestly couldnt care less.
jokerwild5000 0
Nice
obri98 10
Wow you really like to judge don't you
shortstuffs23 7
I can tell you guys are best friends!
YouDeserveWorse 6
Youre cute.do you have a Facebook?I don't wanna sound like a creeper
evnflr 7
funny how their name's patrick....
firecapez 4
lmao, why does your comment have thumbs down? i thought it was a girl the whole time >.< that just makes this 10x funnier
stuner56 22
dude nice pic
throwglitter1 0
your coworker- FTW.