Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML
Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML
Today, after waking up to a spilled bottle of juice on my clothes, I heard my ex died. Whilst baking cookies to distract myself, I melted my work laptop on the toaster. FML
Today, the estranged crumbs in my toaster caught light while I was making breakfast. The toast, toaster, and my wooden bench are now little more than collateral damage. FML
Today, there was a horrible smell in my kitchen. I tried to find the source, but failed and had to leave for the day. That night, my brother informed me that the smell was coming from a dead mouse stuck in our toaster. FML
Today, my cat looked like it was about to puke, so I put him outside. Unhappy with the situation, he leaped on to the kitchen window ledge and squeezed in through the open window, only to projectile-vomit mid-leap all over the kitchen counter. I found a hairball in the butter. FML
Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML
Today, I baked a cake. After feeding it to my entire family, I opened the stove, planning to temporarily store the cake inside. I then noticed a mouse, burnt to a crisp. FML
Today, my cat died. But, before he could bite the dust, he left a goodbye present on my bed: a decapitated baby rabbit. FML
Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML
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Top comments
CitrusGirl 0
That cat's a pussy.
aryan_chris 0
Toasters a new weapon for murder now. What is the world coming to...
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Comments (296)
bubbarific 0
heart cattack ftw!!!
gnrgirl09 0
sorry about your cat op... But damn #17. That was a major win with that comment.
flossybaben 0
haha funny
TheOptimist 0
I'm pretty sure it was toast that popped out of the toaster. Bread is the stuff that goes in, not the stuff that pops out.
jencyz 0
thts saddd
moshmosh 0
:(
Kittehx3 0
.....
ex_stripper_jk 20
Oh my gosh, that's f-ing hilarious! **she says as she coddles her own kitten who's still alive**
XoOxKaiRaWrxOoX 0
and got a side of toast
shakleton82 0
sorry that the cat died but holy cow I did laugh as did the girl and her mum a bus yes a car yes or an old lady who hates cats and puts it in a wheelie bin yes but toast OMG