Today, after waking up to a spilled bottle of juice on my clothes, I heard my ex died. Whilst baking cookies to distract myself, I melted my work laptop on the toaster. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the estranged crumbs in my toaster caught light while I was making breakfast. The toast, toaster, and my wooden bench are now little more than collateral damage. FML
Today, I decided to be healthy and drink a tall glass of water whilst doing my assignment that is due in three days. I managed to spill the entire glass over my laptop. I flipped it over and used a hairdryer to dry it off. While doing that, I managed to melt my keyboard. FML
Today, I baked a cake. After feeding it to my entire family, I opened the stove, planning to temporarily store the cake inside. I then noticed a mouse, burnt to a crisp. FML
Today, while working on my laptop, I accidentally spilled a glass of water. I quickly moved my laptop out of the way of the oncoming stream. It fell on the floor and broke. FML
Today, after a night of back pain, fatigue, and wrestling with my crying, screaming son, who couldn’t sleep, I woke up to find my laptop wouldn’t power on because my daughter spilled ice cream on it. I need my laptop for my new job. FML
Today, I woke up earlier to food prep for lunch later. Just as I was preparing the ingredients, I dropped a thick glass saucer on the kitchen counter and it shattered like a hail storm - everywhere in the kitchen. I ended up spending more time cleaning it out and obviously logged in to work later than usual. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I woke up after putting my child to bed. Drowsy, I stumbled down to the kitchen to make a mug cookie. I read a recipe on my phone, and put a knob of butter in a cup to melt in the microwave. I put my phone in the microwave and turned it on for 30 seconds, and didn't realize what I'd done until I smelt burning plastic. FML
Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML
Today, I was running late for work and I was carrying my stuff to my car, handbag over my shoulder, laptop in one hand, and my coffee in the other. As I tried to unlock my car, I spilt the coffee all over myself, the car, and my laptop. Now, I’m sticky, wet, and my laptop won't turn on. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
How do drugs and/or alcohol figure into this?
rainbowdonnareed 18
Okay so you're a klutz. I was on your side till I saw you put your laptop on the toaster. There's so many people trying for the Darwin Awards
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
How do drugs and/or alcohol figure into this?
rainbowdonnareed 18
Okay so you're a klutz. I was on your side till I saw you put your laptop on the toaster. There's so many people trying for the Darwin Awards
peterblack67 9
You really don't seem that upset that your ex died. You seem more upset about the juice.