Today, my boyfriend, of a year, got drunk and called me flat chested then said the reason he won't have sex with me anymore is because he is "used" to me. He said all of this in front of his friends. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML
Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her." The conversation ended with me getting hung up on, because I "don't have a heart." FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was no longer sexually attracted to me. He then followed that with, "But don't worry, it's not because you're fat." FML
Today, my boyfriend of nearly 4 years, with whom I have a baby, broke up with me. His reason? His best friend said he didn't like drinking with guys who were "tied down". FML
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said I was way too good at sex so I must have lied about not having much experience, and he "wouldn't be with someone who is hiding something." WTF? FML
Today, my boyfriend decided he's asexual and dumped me on the spot. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of my drunken antics. My reaction? Pour myself a stiff drink. FML
Today, while cuddling in bed with my drunk boyfriend, he kissed me softly then told me under no circumstances would he ever marry me. Then kissed me again. FML
Today, my boyfriend video-called me in the middle of the night, drunk after a night out of partying. He told me that he was chatted up by a girl and proudly exclaimed that he told her off, given his status, all the while showing large hickeys on his neck. FML
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Top comments
Leprecon 3
Dump him. He treats you like crap, so don't waste your time with this asshole.
beer01 0
Agreed! Dont stay around if he treats you like shit. Dump him as well, just like crap.
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Comments (140)
ForgottenBruno 0
worst thing u can say is " his dick is 2 inches, after it gets hard" lol
Jax64 0
He's a jerk, just dump him.
KurouTenshi 0
you need to get someone who isn't a total dick OP :)
toeknee33 0
get some boob implants
rite2salas 0
YDI for being flat chested lol..i love gurls wit big *******
love_game911 0
wat is it with guys and big boobs??? id get it!!! yes I have boobs infact I have size D alright?!?! y do guys always wanna either touch them or just stare at them?!?! god!!!! they're not art displaies!!!!!
Elksy 0
...No one was asking you your breast size.
Mifflicious 18
#54, too bad for you you'll never get a girl like that :D Or a girl at all.
love_game911 0
either get a boob job or he is ur ex from now on....I mean really wat kind of dumb ass guy would say that???
cougars2010 0
2: I luv your bod whoever said to get a boob job is stupid dnt change yoself to satisfy any man idc if u luv him or he luv u
stormin972 0
So what. Plenty of people get drunk and talk shit. It's a side effect of drinking.
sanitye 0
u shouldn't get u self used then p.s ur life sucks
benhamean 0
what an asshole!