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FMyLife
Anonymous United States

Today, I contemplated the ratio of cats I have to friends I have. I need more friends. FML

94

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

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Top comments

80skid 15

Or less cats.

Snazzy_Snaz 17

Having more friends would be purrfect

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Comments (94)

80skid 15

Or less cats.

Ugi 27

_Fewer_ cats. Sorry.

ICastillo 25

Or just putting this out there you can go make more friends...

kakarot2 11

Question is... How many cats do you have?

bfsd42 20

17, I think op already knows that. Did you read the whole fml?

pmr1990 12

Maybe the number of cats is responsible for the lack of friends. Sounds like a crazy cat lady to me...

pmr1990 12

Maybe the number of cats is responsible for the lack of friends. Sounds like a crazy cat lady to me...

loopsy_fml 14

1- my thoughts exactly when I read this! Lol!

laden_swallow09 35

Why give 3 so many downvotes? He's right, you know. How many cats OP has is a measurable amount, like quarts of milk. It'd be "fewer quarts of milk" because you can count how many quarts are available. If it were just "milk" it would be "less milk than before." I didn't want to give an English lesson, either, but you guys compelled me to do so.

FATTY_MCDOOGLE 29

Why not both?

annie_nk 23

Cats: There to fill the void.

ApologyKick 25

Cats are like potato chips; you can't just have one.

Werken247 14

^ no one can eat just one..... mmmm I love cats.

iXTMAstro 6

All is vanity. But that's why we have cats. ******* are the best companion for a male or female

Snazzy_Snaz 17

Having more friends would be purrfect

onlychildFTW 34

When you have more cats then friends. You are the cat lady. OP needs more friends for sure.

Carmstro 13

Cat puns? You've got to be kitten me.

MrChrisOake 3

Calm down right meow, Carmstro.

borkchop1992 15

If at amy point in life you have more cats than friends then it's time to take a reality bitch-slap to the face.

AKGirlinSD 20

Exactly. The Original Poster is already a cat lady or a lonely guy with cats (I don't know what the gender opposite for cat lady).

20PercentCooler 8

Nanananananananana CAT MAAAAAN! No? Okay.

mckibben 7

38- pussyman could work

AKGirlinSD 20

Pussyman does sound quite interesting. Makes the man sound like a creeper lol.

loopsy_fml 14

5- *any point. Sorry, couldn't resist. Nobody else did it

laden_swallow09 35

"Pussyman" is already taken. No, I don't know for sure, but it's not a far-gone conclusion that somebody in the **** industry has already done so.

Carmstro 13

83- rule 34...

gc327072 31

You could always just throw some in the dumpster, like that old lady. That'll even out the ratio.

AH1Zviper 15

They were dead first. I think you need to fix your comment before you get thumbed any more.

gc327072 31

It was meant with sarcasm. I'l leave it to the users to thumb it however they see fit.

UncleFreddy 5

Why not just donate the cats to a low quality Chinese restaurant? Then others could enjoy your cats as well.

SenselessPattern 12

Better watch out, 25. You have two choppers on the attack circling your comments.

Warden1986 16

#25 has two F35 on standby..

gc327072 31

^nah, but I have the mods and website users on my side, since one was shot down by negative votes and the other hit by a mod missile.

Enslaved 38

How many cats do you have? Maybe you'd make more friends if you weren't busy at home scooping out kitty litter or brushing your furry "friends".

GothicAngel17 24

But cats are friends :( they're all we need and we must give all our foods and small furry mammals to them and shoot all dogs on sight! I thought everyone knew that?

ambear26 14

30- can't tell if this is sarcasm or not. If not you need to make some human friends. Not that cats aren't enjoyable to have.

GothicAngel17 24

42- it was obviously sarcasm. As if anyone would admit to being that batshit crazy. *sigh* it's like the FML community becomes more dim witted every day.

outoftown 27

#42 - As if? Did you see the FML below about the college geology teacher who got another death threat for teaching evolution? Where do you think the batshit crazies commenting there went?

coolboy675 16

Who'd want more friends than pussy?

AKGirlinSD 20

Anyone who can't get real pussy. *enter sarcasm here*

foreverboredZ 4

lol I like ur pic ^_^

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

41- I tried entering but it didn't work

bestnameright 14

Best me to it! Good 1:)

misspulkadot24 17

But kitties cause less drama, and are easier to maintain. Oh god...I think I have the same problem as OP...

AKGirlinSD 20

Actually, every single friend of mine, including my sister, complains about how their cats' ruin their every thing. One example would be my sister's cat got up on her kitchen counter and knocked a glass of water on her brand new Mac book, that was open and turned on, while my sister went to get an item from her closest. There's a lot of destruction of clothing, carpets, curtains amongst other things.

Zedd_fml 8

My friends can take care of themselves and I don't have to clean, feed, or worship them, cats on the other hand, requires all that, they can be more of an asshole than my semi asshole friends.

zen1979 16

Best case scenario; you get the smartest cat in the world, you've still got an animal that craps in your house.- Red Foreman (sp?)

outoftown 27

#59, Uh-oh. Just realized that my friends crap in my house, too. Luckily, they use the same "human box" I do.

kimg0885 23

Join a kitty lovers group or you could start giving the kitties to your friends!

emeraldisle 30

Or mates who might want to adopt some of your cats.