Today, my boyfriend let out a horrible fart in the middle of sex. Even though it was clearly his, he gave me disgusted look, called me a dirty bitch, then kept going. Let's just say I didn't finish. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, I was desperate for a fart but tried to hold it in so we weren't forced to stop halfway. Unfortunately, I accidentally let the fart escape, along with runny diarrhea, all over my husband's legs and groin. The smell caused him to vomit all over me. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I finally had sex. The entire time he kept begging me to fart, especially on him. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. It was going well until I accidentally passed gas. To add to the embarrassment, he rated it. I only got a 4 out of 10. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
paintedchocolate 30
It was just the two of you. What on earth did he hope to accomplish by pretending it wasn't him? O.o
xpsychocatladyx 15
lady bone killer right there
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (98)
lexa1love 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe that was his attempt at talking dirty? Hopefully you laughed it off.
tormcn 26
Seems like OP's boyfriend is a dirty boy. You deserve it for letting him finish.
DanCastellaneta 17
I don't think talking dirty is meant to be taken literally...
lexa1love 16
Oh no, I forgot to use the sarcasm font. Come on guys.
DanCastellaneta 17
Stop, just stop. This is a website, not a real person.
notesz 21
Watch out, fml police! Oh no, there aren't any...
xpsychocatladyx 15
lady bone killer right there
ironmany_fml 23
bone killer?
Desi_D123 27
I've heard of dirty sex but that's taking it to a new level...
meatloaf11 23
What an asshole
bleedingglitter 24
Pfft I would not have let him finish.
Acerhawk 24
Okay the records 5 lets go!! 1...2...3...4...5...6... YEAH I GOT 6! I GOT 6 AT THE SUN STARE!!
Miss_Chevious 37
What was the relevance of this comment here?
paintedchocolate 30
It was just the two of you. What on earth did he hope to accomplish by pretending it wasn't him? O.o
PePziNL 20
Unless... It wàsn't the two of them.
dakatabg 31
It is always somebody else's fault
phantomofmind 14
Wow, major turn off. Sorry OP.
poppunkette 22
That's just nasty! I would be with holding sex for ages as punishment
WhackTheJackal 22
withholding*
fitforme 4
Sex shouldn't be a punishment and reward thing. That's a ridiculous and immature way of thinking. If you're angry or upset, by all means, don't have sex with him if you aren't feeling it but it shouldn't literally be withheld as a punishment.
chocolatejunebug 9
This. I don't get why people do that....
Badkarma4u 17
Yeah then you'll be whining about him cheating on you.
Aimeejasmine 15
Too far.. No one deserves to get cheated on no matter how immature they act.
Badkarma4u 17
Withholding sex and affection for punishment is manipulation at its finest. If a woman thinks her ****** is a weapon, then a man should show her that every woman has one, and will give it to her man.
Demon_of_Light 27
If a man thinks that a woman owes him sex because he's "her man" and that he has a right to cheat on her if she doesn't give it to him, he's an chauvinist asshole.