Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML
Today, I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites. Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked pictures of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls. His excuse? "I have friends on there." FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has an online blog that he updates every time we have sex. It’s ridiculously detailed, right down to the slight difference in the pink of my vagina and the slightly darker pink of my asshole. He's a dead man when he gets home from work. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's Facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex-girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML
Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML
Today, I introduced this website to my boyfriend. We laughed at a guy who screamed his sister's name during sex. Guess what he thought would be funny to do when I was seconds from coming? FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has an account on a sex hookup site. He said it has "interesting articles" and that he'd completed his profile and listed his sexual preferences out of boredom. When I told him to sign in and prove he hadn't been messaging girls, he refused and called me paranoid. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
rbubbles 20
Quite a funny boyfriend you have there
CrAzYyEt 8
Haha has he poked it yet?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (379)
dentondobbins 0
Does it have any photos
ChucknorrisisGod 6
I just wish I thought of this first
MeMeek 0
Just have a few of your male friends check in ass well and he will get real tired of it. Also it will be easy to find out if he is cheating, just check your feed :P
KandiceCane 3
I've got to say that is quite brilliant
beef25967 2
That's funny to me.
Calyx_fml 22
Like.
Furytalon 14
LOL @ 5-6
Dcm210 19
Does he ever "check out"?
amazingjane 0
Wow, really? That's kinda funny but I would be horrified!
kseizzle 0
Even if its a funny concept, in reality it is disrespectful and any guy worth anything long term wouldn't pull that crap. You, however, are the idiot dating him and apparently putting up with him using your lady parts as a trophy case. YDI.