Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed with a pedestal fan on facing us when my boyfriend sneezed. Where did he sneeze? Into the fan, which then sprayed it all over my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML
Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML
Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML
Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and headbutted me. Now, there's just an awkward silence. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML
Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML
Today, while having fun between the sheets with my boyfriend, his allergies got the best of him and his nose started running. Every time he kissed me he'd drip snot onto my face. When I complained, he said I was being insensitive. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML
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Top comments
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Ha! I know the feeling. Mr. Doe figured out exactly where to stand in front of the A/C to make a fart spread throughout our whole apartment. He thought it was hilarious till I turned the tables on him after a taco fiesta. Yeah, it's probably a good thing that summer's over. An escalation couldn't end well. :]
_TONGAN_ 5
You should pee in front of the fan while he is sitting in front of it...
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Comments (41)
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Ha! I know the feeling. Mr. Doe figured out exactly where to stand in front of the A/C to make a fart spread throughout our whole apartment. He thought it was hilarious till I turned the tables on him after a taco fiesta. Yeah, it's probably a good thing that summer's over. An escalation couldn't end well. :]
deidree 0
Lol. this one is funnier :p
RedPillSucks 33
While you're giving him a handjob, stick his dick in the fan.
Domonator 16
That's like cutting off your nose to spite your face, except it's not a nose, and, judging by the post, it's never been near her face.
ArtIsResistance7 1
I lol'd so hard at those last two comments. 14 & 16: Always a pleasure. All I have is...the shit hit the fan... >.<
Hughmadd 0
You need to do that with diet coke and mentos...
perdix 31
And I'll bet it sounded like the loudest bird in the world! You Aussies need to learn to build decent pedestal fans that don't make a racket and blow aerosolized snot.
Peytonlikesme 0
I LOL'd so hard
unique_mamii 0
Omg that's terrible, how can you live after having something so horrifying happen to you?
jameschis 0
fit
dug44 0
hahahahahahaha, i would have pai to see that!!!!
skittlesxmonster 5
My friend's boyfriend spit into the wind and it hit me in the mouth *shudder* ... then a week later... he did the same thing and it sprayed me in the face...
iheartglasses 0
Haha ew so gross. Just go wash your face lol