Today, my 7 year old daughter explained to a taxi driver that she was born from my "vagina that doesn't have hair". He winked creepily at me and said, "I bet it doesn't." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML
Today, the 7 year old boy I was babysitting studied my upper lip and said "It's okay, my daddy won't let me shave yet either." I'm a girl. FML
Today, on the bus, a man in his late 30s sat next to me. After a moment, he turned to me and said with a wink, "You must be ovulating, I can smell your vagina." FML
Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
Today, I found out that my 8-year-old daughter somehow learned how babies are made. Sort of. I found this out when we had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When one teacher asked where she was from, she replied, "My daddy's balls." FML
Today, I picked up my daughter from the day care but before we left, the babysitter needed to have a talk with me. To fill you in, I got a brand new prius yesterday. Apparently my daughter told eveyone that her mommy got a new penis. FML
Today, I picked up my 17 year-old daughter after a late night movie in down town and got pulled over by a cop. He questioned us for a solicitation. I told the cop that she was my daughter but he said, "So, you're the daddy?" and laughed. Good to know that my daughter looks like a hoe and me a perv. FML
Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML
Today, some kid on the bus kept pissing me off, making fart jokes and singing the Peppa Pig theme song on repeat. Angrily, I confronted him and asked him if he was 7. He retaliated with, "Yeah, 7 inches deep in your MOM!" FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
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Top comments
kjack49044 18
My question is, how does she know?
Retrokitty 9
Kids don't exactly knock.
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Comments (124)
jayceejaco 15
Oh that's just gross
Gittoh 21
haha he should get a big tip
illinoiscentral 16
Correct me if I'm wrong, but in a lot of places it's regular practice to shave the woman in a hospital before she gives birth. Maybe the kid learned about the procedure and that's why she specified it was a hairless ******.
laurenasabutton 26
Pretty sure you're wrong. I have never heard of this happening. There is no medical need, even for a c-section.
speckledots 29
I was shaved for my c-section. Any surgical procedure requires hair removal.
illinoiscentral 16
#55, wikipedia agrees with me on this: Perineal shaving At one time shaving of the perineum, the area around the ******, was common practice due to the belief that hair removal reduced the risk of infection, made an episiotomy (a surgical cut to enlarge the vaginal entrance) easier, and helped with instrumental deliveries. It is currently less common, though it is still a routine procedure in some countries. A 2009 Cochrane review found no evidence of any clinical benefit with perineal shaving. The review did find side effects including irritation, redness, and multiple superficial scratches from the razor.
laurenasabutton 26
So it's not regular practice anymore. My mother wasn't shaven for either of her c-sections.
emirie 21
Back when your mom had you, she was probably cut a little higher than where hair was located. These days when you get a c-section you're cut much lower. If there's hair in an area that will be cut and stitched up, it will be removed.
an3ph 20
Wow. Never thought I'd say this to a 7-year-old, but TMI!
EmmaMK 35
Much better to be open with kids, without saying too much. If you lie, they won't trust you or talk to you when they find out the truth. Like most families, we don't close our doors when we get dressed in the morning.
Neesalun 20
I guess some families are more free with nudity and comfortable with what is seen. Nothing wrong with this, but strange for those that weren't raised this way. Good to know some parents are sharing the "birds & the bees" instead of a child with nothing to go on. I'm still waiting for "The Talk".
DenBriZel 31
Um, that's kind of extremely awkward. Wait, how would a 7 year old even understand the difference?
hedurr 4
My guess, based upon my own experience as a mom, is that the little girl walked in on her mom more than once without knocking. It doesn't make her a bad mom, nothing bad happened, we moms just don't get to poop alone.
huss11 6
WTF
perdix 31
Since your daughter just gave him the best tip of the week, you can just pay the fare and stiff him.
Sophie_Hart 9
What kind of things is she learning from school?!
lendary 7
Basic facts about anatomy?
RedPillSucks 33
@68 It's unlikely that she's learned this from school, although I'm basing this on US education even though I know OP is from Australia. Most likely, the mom and daughter probably just had an innocent and honest conversation, or the daughter just observed.
hedurr 4
Doubt it is from school. It's probably more likely that she walked in on her mother without knocking! I'm a mom, it happens lol