Today, my 7 year old daughter explained to a taxi driver that she was born from my "vagina that doesn't have hair". He winked creepily at me and said, "I bet it doesn't." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML
Today, the 7 year old boy I was babysitting studied my upper lip and said "It's okay, my daddy won't let me shave yet either." I'm a girl. FML
Today, on the bus, a man in his late 30s sat next to me. After a moment, he turned to me and said with a wink, "You must be ovulating, I can smell your vagina." FML
Stunned silence
Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
True
Today, I found out that my 8-year-old daughter somehow learned how babies are made. Sort of. I found this out when we had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When one teacher asked where she was from, she replied, "My daddy's balls." FML
Today, I picked up my daughter from the day care but before we left, the babysitter needed to have a talk with me. To fill you in, I got a brand new prius yesterday. Apparently my daughter told eveyone that her mommy got a new penis. FML
Assumptions
Today, I picked up my 17 year-old daughter after a late night movie in down town and got pulled over by a cop. He questioned us for a solicitation. I told the cop that she was my daughter but he said, "So, you're the daddy?" and laughed. Good to know that my daughter looks like a hoe and me a perv. FML
Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML
Don't get involved
Today, some kid on the bus kept pissing me off, making fart jokes and singing the Peppa Pig theme song on repeat. Angrily, I confronted him and asked him if he was 7. He retaliated with, "Yeah, 7 inches deep in your MOM!" FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
Top comments
kjack49044 18
My question is, how does she know?
Retrokitty 9
Kids don't exactly knock.
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Comments (124)
WhiteCrimson 23
Leave it to the kids to make a day go topsy turvy in a millisecond. Their just to damn cute. Sorry OP. Use caution next time you get naked around your child.
awkwardloveannie 28
wait do you have more than one ******? a hairy one? and what brought up that conversation
Nilorak 24
What?
juan77football 6
Kids just say random stuff sometimes. If they know a secret it will come out somehow
Enslaved 38
Australia-- whatcha got going on down under?
DKjazz 20
Also, the tag says South Australia. Hehe.
jcross01 9
apparently nothing at all.
mayley 16
Take it as a compliment :)
BellaBear90 27
How is that a compliment?
LennyComa 39
Kids these day's eh? Seriously though at 7?
Spark_Slicker 19
I'm more curious as to what this ****** that doesn't have hair is? Does she mean a C-section? If so, I was born from my mother's ****** that doesn't have hair too.
doodlecloud 27
I think she just literally means a ****** (well, a vulva) that has been shaved/waxed. I think you're reading too much into it...
Spark_Slicker 19
Oh, haha. My bad. I thought she was talking about something entirely separate. I didn't realize she was just talking about how her mother's ****** is currently hairless.
chuka81 27
So you already had the talk with your 3 year old? And very explicitly too. I can't decide if it's a bad thing or not.
doodlecloud 27
If you're referring to the 'without hair' bit, she's probably just seen the mum naked, no big deal at that age. If you're referring to the fact that she knows her origin, it's a good thing - now she won't make a big deal about it when she's a preteen. Just another fact of life, and one associated with baby-making rather than 'being cool' at that. Plus it was likely just the answer to a naturally asked question rather than a forced 'talk'.
bubblyhayley 16
she said her daughters 7!! and kids no more than u think.best to be open and honest with them
UnitarySaucer 15
She will be really smart because she will remember everything at school
metalcrazed 21
Why would you tell a 7 year old that? YDI!
Sitting_Ducki 8
Okay while everyone's wondering how she knows a hairy ****** my question is how did she know there wasn't any hair?