Today, my 19-year-old, long-distance boyfriend told me he wouldn't be able to text me all day because it's too hard to type while in his Spider-Man suit. It's non-negotiable. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my boyfriend why he wasn't on Facebook for the last two days. It turned out his father found out we were talking, and banned him from logging on. He's 19. FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text that said, "I can't be seen with you anymore. You're too fat." FML
Today, a boy I'm not even dating took it upon himself to tell me that we would never work out. Via text message. FML
Today, my boyfriend refused to take me out on our three year anniversary because he was busy, "training to become a professional gamer." FML
Today, my boyfriend refuses to talk to me because of a misread text. FML
Today, after a hard day's work and emotional argument with my best friend, I sent my boyfriend a text telling him how much I loved him and cherished him in the hopes he would cheer me up with a romantic reply. He said "Sorry, I've only got 8 texts left." FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend, and he pretended he was a Burger King employee who found a lost phone, just so that he wouldn't have to talk to me. FML
Today, the guy I've been flirting with for a week, and would be meeting in two days, sent me a message that he wouldn't be able to text me this evening because he'll be on a date. FML
Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML
Today, my son wanted to be Spiderman. He found the biggest spider he could outside and let it bite his hand. He's staying overnight in the hospital. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
You should feel honored to have a superhero for a boyfriend.
Apretendbiscuit 12
Is this an FML because you don't have a spider-man suit?
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Comments (173)
SarcasticShade 16
Just hangout on the web until he takes his costume off.
Rainhawk94 27
No stahp
Enslaved 38
I guess his spidey senses failed him if he didn't know you'd be irked! :P
jc10x 8
Try again.
Gv_girl 2
Are you effing serious? How is this an FML? Yes, you're clearly going to die if you can't talk to your boyfriend for an entire day, Jesus Christ, grow up!
Pwn17 25
Because all FMLs totally need to be the most devastating thing possible.
buckdharma 38
#16- Peter Parker picked a text of pickled letters. Duh!
Enslaved 38
Buck, I thought it was-- "Picky people pick Peter Pan peanut butter, it's the peanut butter picky people pick." (:
iiTzNeeNerz 26
Your boyfriend is cool enough to dress up as Spider-Man. Let him enjoy his outfit without coming across as needy.
josh7279 7
I think you will survive that he can't text you every minute of the day.. Relax OP
JennaNGood 21
That was literally the only thing running through my mind while reading this. Honestly OP, this is an FML because your boyfriend can't text you all day? Grow up.
BobbieH 19
Deal with it, its only hours. I'm certain you'll live. Why did you attempt to negotiate in the first place?
alycion 39
Married military spouses go even longer without communication. It's one day. Let him enjoy himself.
Gv_girl 2
josh7279, yes my thoughts exactly....if OP thinks this is the worst thing ever just wait til she enters the real world
buddy_J 16
It's just one day. You complaining about it like this makes it look like you're not old enough and or awesome enough to be dating him. Spider-Man suit = epic
INDYSTRUCTABLE 43
damn ..webbed fingers, tisk tisk