Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML
Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML
Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML
Today, while we were exploring a building, my dad and I somehow got separated. After about 30 seconds, I found him on the other side of a door, so I went to go through what I thought was a door. Instead, I smashed my head on a windowpane and collapsed to the floor in pain in front of 5 people. FML
Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML
Today, I went upstairs to scold my boys for running in the house because someone could get hurt. As I turned around to come back downstairs I tripped and fell all the way down to the landing at the bottom. I could hear them laughing in their rooms. FML
Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML
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Top comments
JoeGrant 12
More like **** her life...I mean for god sake she ran into a glass door!
KBurns207 17
Lol good old fashioned brotherly love. And at only 10 years old the escapades have only just begun. That's funny but I hope your daughter is ok!
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Comments (123)
randm_dude 9
I must admit I found it funny. Glass door probably sounds scarier than it actually was. I guess she bumped her head. It's not like a glass door shatters if a 5 year old runs against it once. A laceration or if she was really unlucky a concussion. Kids. Your son was probably more scared after the accident than you are. Sorry op, I imagine the tour to the hospital with two crying kids to be really stressful.
MeLoveCats 7
i ran straight into a glass door one time thinking it was open when i was a little girl. i got knocked out, but didn't have to go to the hospital. your daughter must have really ran for that door in order to need medical help. sucks for your daughter. sorry OP
diagnosed 15
wow you're really raising some genius is there:-..... not really..... I think it's time to sif down and have a little conversation with your son
skyeyez9 25
I remember watching the tv show in the 90s called "Rescue 911." A girl was sitting at the kitchen table and leaned too far back in her chair and fell backwards, shattering the glass sliding door behind her. A piece of glass sliced her so deep, her intestines were sticking out of her side. I doubt OPs kid was hurt that bad. But she probably chipped her front teeth, or had a broken nose depending how hard she ran at the glass.
kee_breezy32 34
that was so mean, I hope the little girl is okay!
JustForTheLaughs 8
your son deserves a medal
soprano23 8
Please tell me he followed this up with, "Oh, I guess you're adopted."
skyeyez9 25
Older brothers are usually assholes. Mine burned me once. Lit a fork till it was real hot then touched my arm with it. Also tried to drown me when I was 4. Shoved me off the raft into the ocean, and then said Nothing! My mom found me almost 2 minutes later unconscious and lungs full of water at the bottom (about 6ft deep). My brother lied and said "I jumped in"
iwadasn 33
Your brother tried to KILL you? I hope you don't think that's a normal way for siblings to interact!
JacobH34 10
That kid's going places...not college, but definitely places.
Danfran_1147 10
Your son is a GENIUS!