Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML
Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML
Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML
Today, while we were exploring a building, my dad and I somehow got separated. After about 30 seconds, I found him on the other side of a door, so I went to go through what I thought was a door. Instead, I smashed my head on a windowpane and collapsed to the floor in pain in front of 5 people. FML
Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML
Today, I went upstairs to scold my boys for running in the house because someone could get hurt. As I turned around to come back downstairs I tripped and fell all the way down to the landing at the bottom. I could hear them laughing in their rooms. FML
Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML
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Top comments
JoeGrant 12
More like **** her life...I mean for god sake she ran into a glass door!
KBurns207 17
Lol good old fashioned brotherly love. And at only 10 years old the escapades have only just begun. That's funny but I hope your daughter is ok!
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Comments (123)
TheLittleBear 19
I'm sure it'll end up as one of those funny family stories. In about 20 years.
beclaurela 18
Your son is a genius. Also needs a bit of a punishment, wouldn't you say? So sorry about your daughter though, I hope she's okay!
FretMasterLive 4
Sensu bean!
darviller 17
[interviewer voice] so how does it feel to have raised two morons?
Ari1337 15
he raised a (genius) asshole and a 5 year old. why don't you ask your parents how it feels to have raised a moron?
tiatialiu 6
What a bad boy!
logankyng 15
Trust no one
_Neshaa 5
Well at least you're not a ghost family (:
daboar 5
i don't think your son meant to hurt his sister that badly. i think he meant to make her look stupid for believing in him. my brother is 6 years old than me and that was the kind of things he would do when we were thst age.
mcm_3 16
That was a cruel on your son's part, hope your daghter is ok tho.
lochiamochia 25
That sounds just like my brother. Welcome to parenthood, OP.