anonymous
United States
Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
So close
Today, not only did my ex-wife take everything in our divorce, my most recent lottery ticket was off by only one number, I would have won millions and she wouldn’t have been entitled to a penny. Oh well, back to sleeping in my caravan, which is all I have left. FML
LD619
United States
Today, I gave my ex-girlfriend two concert tickets to show her I still care about her and want to win her back. She sold them. FML
kerensa
Mornington, Australia
Chill, lady
Today, a lady threw a coke bottle at my head because she had a non-winning lottery ticket. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML
D-Man
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
United States
Fate
Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend got engaged to a coworker. I got her the job. FML
an unlucky man
Simi Valley, United States
Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML
notsolucky
Stamford, United States
Today, I won a lottery at my local grocery store. Excited, I went to claim my prize, only to discover it was a bottle of red wine. I'm a recovering alcoholic. FML
Dumbass
Idiot tax
Today, my boyfriend came home, complaining about not having enough money for bills. He then pulled a stack of lottery tickets out of his bag, saying, "I hope one of these wins." FML
whereismyring
Los Angeles, United States
Today, my ex-boyfriend announced he was engaged. We broke up last night. FML
Sudokori
A Dog's Love = Priceless
Today, I bought a lottery ticket. Two hours ago, I found out that the ticket was worth $100. Five minutes ago, I found my dog eating it. FML
Top comments
SeasonedLemur 5
Shiiiiiit! ****! that's literally THE worst fml I've ever read! if this fmls genuine I'm really really sorry for you mate! If I was in your shoes I'd probably shoot myself! But don't! I'd suggest pretending to have left something at her place, go round and rob the bitch!! Good luck fella.
james_aka_frosty 3
even with the correction it doesn't make sense
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Comments (91)
manny2 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
take her back until u get the ticket back. then... dump her ass
otheriBlair 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
its his fault. he dumped her she deserves it
CryMoreFMLs 15
Why are you showin us your tougue? Are you showin us a sample of what you can do or something? Ugh...
seanders 10
55: Your statement is horribly false. He could have left her for many good reasons.:)
felipe87 2
then when/if he gets the ticket back we will be seeing a fml from the gf
ILoveTabz 0
no... it's not his fault like #69 said... I think. he could've dumped her for any reason.
ImmortalKratos 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
you better sum poonaynay till she takes you back or have a chance to take your ticket back
mozeltov 7
sorry? could you restate that in modern english?
ImmortalKratos 0
*eat sum poonaynay
abbi96x 0
Well I guess you won't be getting the money then D:!
james_aka_frosty 3
even with the correction it doesn't make sense
sarahbella101 7
shoulve taken the ticket BEFORE breaking up.
princessRiRi97 0
wtf were you drunk typing while commenting poonanay WTF! Dumb ass! fyl 4 being stupid!
imacreeper 3
1, wtf is a poonaynay? anyway, how did you win the lottery if she has the ticket?
Hi_Itz_Me 0
Poonaynay = pussy.
fooch 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
then your GIRLFRIEND won not YOU
ILoveTabz 0
not necessarily...
illmatic2 16
I think that it goes to whoever bought the ticket.
alexg823 0
I bet she was all depressed until she realized she won thousands of dollars.
kewlone645 8
It goes to whoever signs the back. lol
gamerhead 3
that's not lucky
Aaron_Luvz_U 9
better luck next time:*( or u know sue her :
clairevoent 0
just reason with her and share the winnings. that simple.
DarkHelmet 10
Are u HIGH!!!!! don't give her SHIZZNIT!!!!
bubulz_fml 0
who's to say she wants to share? if he signed it she can't cash it... however if she destroys it he's screwed. if he didn't sign it she could sign it and take it all
bjohnst12 0
today, I didn't win the lottery. FML
TalkinSmack 6
that's why u sign the back of the ticket! YDI!
jess6blondie9 3
Karma.
corporatescoundr 25
you look like my Lil sister...
jennifer93 0
oh wow...well if it was not a bad breakup hopefully she will have the decency to at least share the winnings with you...good luck
DarkHelmet 10
do u live in Bizarro World? The "decency to give it back" a winning lotto ticket!!!!!!! not in a million years will she give it back.
jennifer93 0
I didnt say give it back, I said share the winnings....
CryMoreFMLs 15
This new dark helmet guy doesn't appeal to me. I might add him to my shitlist with gayboii