Today, I woke up to the face of Billy, the puppet from Saw, staring down at me. I was so scared, I wet myself instantly. It was my cousin in a mask, who is staying over for Thanksgiving weekend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was awakened by a small scary dark figure approaching me while making creepy noises. I screamed, kicked it away, and buried my face under my pillow. Later, after braving up, I turned on the lights. It was my sick 3-year-old niece, now dazed and coughing blood. FML
Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML
Today, I woke up to my husband's face. That'd be nice if he hadn't turned his eyelids inside out, waiting to scare me. I was scared alright. So scared that I pissed myself and broke my side table falling out of bed. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I pissed myself. FML
Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
Today, I was trying to sleep when I saw a head looming from the darkness with no eyes and a mouth open like a silent scream. I just froze and pissed myself. It was my daughter wanting to cuddle with us. Alas, the bed was wet, so she got put back in her bed, while we had to share the sofa downstairs. FML
Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my bed when I woke up in horror to see that my 34-year-old cousin, who was spending the night, was watching me sleep. Once he noticed that I was awake, he quietly left the room. I told my mom, who then told me not to tell anyone and pretend that it never happened. FML
Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
amerwin 3
Want to play a game?
sourgirl101 29
I always thought his name was "Jigsaw". Learned something new.
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Comments (133)
Epitome1337 0
wow, you little baby, go crawl in a corner and cry.
wtfurcrazy 0
lol the puppet made you wet :P
im2cool2fml 0
haha
neversayYES 0
wow. this isTOTALLY AN FML WOW IT REALLY IS. LOVIN IT!
2kool4skoolyo 0
fail man fail sir fail life fail
DudeImBetter 0
^^ I don't think you transferred the 5 dollars to my fml account yet.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
That's strange o find the mask a turn on
asmah 0
lol whts scary is the jason costume my sister wore nd scared me while I ws cleaning the dishes...now I have many pieces of Brocken glass in my foot thnx sis great joke
s_sandoval 0
#59 - win!
unidentified_sta 5
Instantly wet yourself? So... like your bladder or your sphincter exploded?
xFalzz 0
60, your comment makes my eyes bleed.
rallets 23
did he want to play a game?
i_like_pie_mofo 0
77, haha really
redpump 0
Agreed #77. I don't mind the shortening of words, but broken being spelt as brocken is just unacceptable *shakes head*.
tman0697 0
hey u would of done the same thing so shut up
MagneticGuitar 0
In soviet Russia, puppet moves you.
Lifeisntfair13 0
This is funny I would hbe been scared to op and done the samething
LovesLostInteres_fml 8
that'd be amazing not an fml!
robc32ca 4
you would have done the same thing because you're a cute little puppy with a bow on your head...yes you are! whose a cute little puppy.. you are...you are!!!
Lolerskatez 0
#102 ******* lol, this FML is making the favourites cause of your comment, keep it up xD
Judus_beej 0
be thankful your still in diapers. happy thanksgiving!
Epilepsy_fml 0
Can you say pussy. Haha
Zya_fml 8
?
Lounia_fml 8
No, can you say WET pussy?
stewpididiot 11
sniff snif... I knew I smelled pussy !!!
ulicki 0
Make sure you get the chain saw and scare the shit outta him. That'll teach him.
punbarry1 0
u wanna be Justin bieber so bad....
aliaskis 3
The chainsaw guys in those haunted mazes always scared me so much. Logically, I knew they couldn't really hurt me. Still, I ran screaming every time.
Thecarpaltunnelo 0
Ha. That's funny. I'm sorry, OP.
amerwin 3
Want to play a game?
jakeisawake 3
For real. Imagine being asked that question while hanging upside down above sulphuric acid. If you told him no, and you just wanted to go home, he is more than likely to be all, "**** you too then." And just drown your ass in the acid.
fadingaway 17
He never said ''Want to play a game?'', he said ''I want to play a game''.
s0trang 0
I woulda beat the shit outta him
btnhdude 0
if that happened I would laughed cuz someone would be getting their ass kicked by a girl who just wet herself
btnhdude 0
have* I Just grammar nazi'd myself oh the irony
btnhdude 0
ah dammit I didn't even write anything wrong In there but my punctuation, I only forgot to write "have" in there uuurghhh
btnhdude 0
why thank you, I'm so changed by your comment it's so very important of what you think of my triple posting - love, btnhdude AAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Draminicaus 0
OP is male, dude. ^
mike3775 39
I have been startled when waking up, but never enough to make me piss myself though. Sounds like you have a playful cousin, so concoct a scheme to get him back
colombiancartel 0
..poor you?..
Lightninglord 0
#16 Wtf is wrong with you?!?!?!? Also, I would get up and beat him up sooooooobad
colombiancartel 0
Pardon?
undeadcorpseYAY 0
ZOMG! your profile picture scared me...sowwy! 0_o
lacrossekid 0
is that a human I'n ur picture ??
colombiancartel 0
94, You're not that far from "Scary" either ha ha
mikehaddad 0
DAMN