Today, after weeks of my girlfriend telling me to be romantic, I decided to make a romantic bath for us, complete with oil bath beads. After we get ready to take the bath, she puts her hand in the water and says she won't get it because 'it feels slimy'. I enjoyed a romantic bath alone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML
Today, at my girlfriend's place, I cleaned up her room, put candles everywhere, scented the air, and placed rose petals all over her bed in an attempt to be romantic and loving. The first thing she said when she saw all this was, "Uhhhhgg, I'll have to clean all this up." FML
Today, I was relaxing in the bath with oils and candles and a new book when my husband burst in with diarrhoea, filled the toilet, polluted the air, and knocked my new book into the bathwater. Then, while washing his hands, he asked if I wanted an oil covered shag. Romantic, right? FML
Today, when I woke up, I got into the bath that my boyfriend had prepared for me. I particularly appreciated its smell, so I asked him what he'd used. "I couldn't find the usual bath salts you use, so I just used what I could." It's official, I've taken a Alka-Seltzer flavored bath. FML
Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to take a shower, because he smelt awful and wanted to cuddle. After 45 minutes, he did so. I wanted to cuddle and fool around after he was done. I got rejected because he didn't want to get dirty. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, I was excited to finally use the expensive bath bombs I'd been saving. I filled the tub, dropped one in, and settled in for a relaxing soak. The bath bomb fizzed so much that it created a bubble mountain that spilled over, flooding my bathroom with colorful suds. My "relaxing" bath turned into a Slip 'N Slide adventure as I tried to mop up the mess in my birthday suit. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the river. She threw mud on me, so I playfully threw some on her, and we got into a mud fight. Apparently, she took the "fight" seriously, because I'm now single. FML
Today, I wanted to take a bubble bath with the jets in the bath that I haven't used in years. When I got in, it took me a while to realize that the jets had squirted out slime and a family of unidentifiable bugs that have probably been living there for years. FML
Today, my boyfriend turned down a shower with me because he didn't want to get his hair wet. FML
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Top comments
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
sometimes a romantic bath with your hand is all you need
alex1432 9
Next time just tell her to suck your dick in the moonlight...
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Comments (96)
Flamehog9 0
fyl indeed.
AthinaMarie 0
That's actually very kinky. ^ Dont know about her but that would excite me lol
robosonic 2
Errr... very very kinky. I wonder what was in the water ;P
_HeadShot_ 0
17 - cum
marmlr339 14
that's girls for ya!
Timmo_fml 2
20 - love the bluntness. But alllll of the bath water was slimy, who do you think came in there? A randy horse??
rallets 23
looks like youre the one thats not gonna "get it" amirite? notice the typo up there? eh? ehhhh? ahhh ok
jewban 3
*fapfapfapfap*
xxnike1134xx 0
oh daymn!;)
skorpien 1
33, it was a sperm whale. ^___^
colombiancartel 0
It was me..
colombiancartel 0
It was me..
untoward 0
no FML here because he still enjoyed the bath.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
sometimes a romantic bath with your hand is all you need
skyttlz 32
lol
InfiltratedMind 0
like*
Zya_fml 8
like?
jocelyng_fml 0
24 I think that's his way of seeing win
jocelyng_fml 0
saying*
Rei_Ayanami 18
Why even bother? There's obviously no pleasing her, just push her head towards your crotch when she says it.
Nico1929 5
knock knock...who's there? it's me... wondering why you're not naked.... knock knock... who's there? it's me again.... still wondering why you're not naked....
sxcthaigirl 6
oh jeez...boys and they're kinkiness. lmao:)
AaronSeal 0
Jim Lajole
kananadah 2
next time try buying flowers :)
Zya_fml 8
that still won't solve the slimy water part...
blinks 0
don't even bother with the bitch.
ChaChaNiceGuy 0
Flowers make the water slimy too.
RavenXRampage 1
Oh yes. Plant genitalia; for any and every occasion. That's original. At least OP tried. I'd say there's just no pleasing her, she's being unfair and very ungrateful. Slimy.. Bah! She's complaining about bath oil. Whiny bitch.
cocainewhore 30
How does the girl not liking oil in the bath make her a bitch? She could have said it in a nicer way, but too much oil does feel unpleasant sometimes.
bob007_fml 0
what a bitch. I'm sorry but that is romantic and I dont know alot of guys that do that.
kindlystfupls 0
I also know a lot of guys that WON'T do that so if you find one of the ones willing to do stuff like that GRAB HIM AND DON'T LET GO!! lol
skittle68 0
My bf couldn't do that if he wanted to. Our bathtub is too little :/ I'm 5' even and I barely fit in it by myself. That was super nice of him tho! My bf does other stuff to be romantic, like offering to do anal when I'm on my period, and pushing on the back of my head when I do oral lol... He's sooo romantic!
Kua_Mei 0
I can't even tell whether you're being sarcastic or not.
sassypants93 17
64 I'm pretty sure she is lol
a_girl_i_know 0
why is it a Fyl? you just said you enjoyed a bath, it was alone, but you enjoyed it nonetheless.
unfortunate_13 5
it's called sarcasm.
a_girl_i_know 0
oh...lol. I just realized that.
t765234 10
Fail.
Splayd 10
"Failure," you moron. You cannot (properly) use "fail" as a noun.
kayla820 0
Slimy? Time to find a new gf who actually has a brain >_<
catatonicsleep 17
Doesn't bath oil make the water oily?
And_Jelly 0
It's called bath oil for a reason right?
ImALuckyBastard 0
I woulda spooged on shower/tub wall as a parting gift.
alex1432 9
Next time just tell her to suck your dick in the moonlight...
valdancer99 0
lol
eternalsunlight 5
Lol romantic bath? Plus points for being creative! You should have insisted that she join you but in the future maybe ask her to specify what she means by romantic? That could be simpler and much more effective!!
And_Jelly 0
It's super effective! Girlfriend fainted! Boyfriend gained 74xp points What is this? -Evolve music- Boyfriend has evolved to Badass Dude!
DarkWaffle 0
^^Pokémon references ftw
cassiebraga 0
that sucks, that's a pretty good effort!