Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after a long day at work, I fell asleep in my living room. When I woke up, I saw a man leaving my bedroom wearing my pajamas, and I started screaming as he casually left. The cops came and apparently he's mentally ill. He truly believed it was his house. FML
Today, my mom informed me that she saw me sleepwalking last night. I didn't think much of it, until I remembered that I went to bed without any clothes on last night. FML
Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML
Today, I found out my grandma sleeps in the nude. I witnessed her running naked from her bedroom to the bathroom, because she "didn't have enough time" to put on her robe. I need to get my own place. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of footsteps outside my room. I investigated but found nothing. As I went back to my room, I heard a sort of giggling from inside. I was so scared, I grabbed my car keys, got the fuck out of there, and drove to my girlfriend's house in my pajamas. FML
Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML
Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML
Today, my 76 year-old mother-in-law stayed the night at our house. I bumped into her on the way to the bathroom during the night. She discovered I sleep naked. Sadly, I found out that she does, too. FML
Today, I got locked out of my house in my pajamas while trying to take the trash out. My neighbor offered to help, but only after taking a picture of me for "future laughs." FML
Today, I locked myself out while taking the trash downstairs. I was wearing pajamas, slippers, and a winter coat over nothing else. My neighbor offered to help, then spent ten minutes trying not to laugh while I explained that my keys were sitting on the kitchen counter. FML
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Top comments
lettertjes 0
Ohhh that's bad I would be totally freaked out. Maybe you should also think about what caused the sleepwalking and do something about that. The most common causes are stress and alcohol abuse.
maskedman 9
It's a good thing you're a woman. If you were a man you'd be registering as a sex offender right now. Then it wouldn't matter where you move.
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Comments (129)
KnioBerry 0
That would be way awkward to open your door in the middle of the night to see a naked woman at my doorstep. Well, for a guy it wouldn't be, but you're really lucky you didn't go to some guys door and he asked what you wanted and you said, "To get into bed,", thinking it was your own house. o.e YO ASS COULDA GOT RAPED :P
sc95060sc 0
bullllllshiiit
stechly21 0
I wish I could have seen that one
amymarie13 0
by " that time " what are you referring to
brnybrwn 0
u made my day! I would soooo do something like that!
Gabbiegummies 4
wow I'm sure ur neighbor just loved seeing you in her room nakedstealin her pajamas in the middle of the night
blastvortex 4
Now just how much did you have to drink the night before? *eyeroll* BTW, you wouldn't have had the other problem if you didn't sleep naked; you only brought that part on yourself.
Newno 0
That sucks. Happened to me before too when i was young. But i wasn't naked and no one noticed me.
DrLemon 0
h
DrLemon 0
I sleep walk. I have had conversations with family members, walked around, cried, walked down stairs, opened doors and such.. except I never remember, my family basically tells me.
DrLemon 0
you actually have a lot of control. when you sleep walk it's basically like being contious but you are reacting to what's in your head (like a dream) and not to other people. for example, I was crying and telling my mom some nonsense (I could not remember it happened) and even though I was having a conversation with her, and my eyes were open, I was reacting to what was happening to my dream and she was just a voice. at least, that's what's with me.