Today, I went to the store with my girlfriend. She needed to use the bathroom so I started looking at the books. It wasn't until the manager shot me a weird look that I realized I'd wandered down too far and was looking at bridal magazines, holding tampons, dog treats, and hair spray. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML
Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML
Today, I went to a store to buy a man's thong because my girlfriend wanted me to. When I went in I also grabbed some lingerie for her. Thinking I was being clever I wrapped it up in a t-shirt so no one would notice and went to checkout. The cashier then called for a price check on the thong. FML
Today, I had just reached in my purse without looking to grab a granola bar when my boss walked in my office. We talked for a few minutes as he kept giving me strange looks and looking at my hand. He left and I realized I hadn't taken a granola bar out, but a tampon instead. FML
Today, I was at the store buying some feminine products. At the cash register, the clerk said to me "Dude, you know those are for girls right?" I am a 30 year old woman. FML
Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML
Today, I went to the shops with my little sister. We had to walk through the lingerie section of the store to get to another part. My sister then yelled at the top of her voice, "Stop following me, you freak." I had security escort me out of the store, and got many dirty looks. She thought it was hilarious. FML
Today, I walked into a store, grabbed a shopping cart, and started browsing. After 15 seconds, I realized I was in the wrong store. The cashier watched as I awkwardly returned my cart and walked out like I totally meant to do that. FML
Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML
Today, I was in the romantic section of a book store making fun of the titles. Thinking my friend was behind me, I read in a sexy voice, “Sleeping with a Stranger” and turned to laugh only to find the 70-year-old store manager smiling and winking at me. FML
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Top comments
Beebow_fml 5
Better than rope, duct tape and lube.
rothus66 7
Try condoms, whip cream, chocolate, duct tape, and a pineapple that got me some weird looks and was the last time I shopped for my friends.
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Comments (134)
satph 12
LOL that's pretty unfortunate for you!
Miss_Attitude96 24
"Uhh, this isn't what it looks like."
Degraded 2
You must have been really bored.
ArcticPuppet 0
Well you've gotta admit it, some dog treats are pretty ******* delicious.
rkmepm 16
Speaking from personal experience aye? ;)
stargazur 9
Well, yes. One time I made some home made for my dog.they had flour, water, vanilla extract, sugar and peanut butter in them. They didn't taste bad.
zombicidal 11
OP is going to have a nice.... week!
hbbs93 6
I see what you did there haha.
hartrum 0
the manager must of thought u were trying o get a sex change and u were preparing for the time o the month
RedPillSucks 33
..., and the dog treats?
HonestlyHonest 0
Transwomen don't menstruate.
hartrum 0
maybe the cravings lol
shanhal 0
My self, i think its cute that you were doing that. Your a good boyfriend!
False_Stupidity 42
I'm also often to be found holding various feminine hygiene products for my fiancée while she looks for something..
HomeAl0ne 20
Even funnier when you're doing the shopping and your partner has asked you to but tampons, panty liners etc. Being unfamiliar with the packaging, you have to spend a fair bit of time standing there perusing the shelves, reading all the names.
x_glowstik_x 0
How did yu not notice the feel of the box of tampons and not notice the hairspray
neonberries 15
She planned it that way!
docscientist 10
This is like... The most vanilla fml ever.