Today, my wife is mad at me for discouraging our son from baby talking. He's seven, well past the age where exaggerated mush-mouth baby talk is cute. It's grating and off-putting to see him rolling on the floor going, "Me luh mummuh and daddeh" when he's a perfectly smart, well adjusted kid. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife got a call from my son's school, telling her that he was talking inappropriately in class, using bad language. Neither my wife or I ever use foul language, spoken or written. I feel like such a failure as father and parent. FML
Today, according to my husband, our son is at the difficult age where he can finally speak fluent English, but is still too childishly dumb to say anything interesting, intelligent or frankly worth listening to at all. There are times I wish I was a divorced single mum. FML
Today, my toddler started running around the house yelling, "Daddy said a bad word!" over and over again. I don't even know what I allegedly said, but now my wife is giving me the "we need to talk" look. FML
Today, my fiancée's son mocked me at breakfast. When I reprimanded him for being disrespectful, my fiancée rolled her eyes and said he was being playful and to stop criticizing him. He's 6, he's damn well old enough to know that mocking someone is rude. FML
Today, my son said his first word, which was, "Fuck". He got it from my great aunt, who my wife was skeptical of our son meeting because she "says too many bad words". Sorry, Honey. FML
Today, my wife changed her mind on us having kids, because her eight year-old son said he liked being an only child. She says that my devastated and angry reaction is incredibly unattractive and immature, and that I need to accept compromise. FML
Today, I asked my son to repeat something he had said. He got right up in my face and screamed that it was time I got a "fucking hearing aid." His siblings agreed with him. My husband agreed so much, he won’t even punish him for yelling and swearing, because, “Honestly, we all wanted to scream it.” FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML
Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML
Today, my wife told my 7-year-old son that he looks just like me. He began crying and said, "I don't want to be ugly like him." FML
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Top comments
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Sounds like your wife is encouraging his behavior.
Yudith 28
When your son's teacher will tell your wife that your son's baby talk is impeding his grades, you can tell her "I told you so! But you wouldn't listen!"
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Comments (3)
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Sounds like your wife is encouraging his behavior.
Yudith 28
When your son's teacher will tell your wife that your son's baby talk is impeding his grades, you can tell her "I told you so! But you wouldn't listen!"
BloodyButUnbowed 32
Is it because she wants you to ignore it -- a difference of opinion on the best strategy -- or is it because she finds it cute and wants to encourage it? The first one is just a discussion, but the second one is an alarming situation.