Today, I went to my Calculus lecture, one of a class of 200 people. As I looked down I noticed that a guy a few rows in front of me was on Facebook. When I took a closer look, I noticed he was viewing my profile. He stalked the profile for a full 45 minutes. I have never met this guy in my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the computer in the library on campus. I was Facebook-stalking a really cute girl that I often see on campus. As I'm looking at her profile pictures, I turn around and the girl is standing right behind me. She gave me a disgusted look and walked off. FML
Today, I received a message from a weird guy that's been stalking me online. Apparently, he travelled 4 hours last weekend to go to the same event as me, just to stare at me. He knew a LOT of details. He never spoke to me because that would "have been weird". I don't know what he looks like, so didn't recognise him. FML
Today, I saw a girl on the subway that I knew so I started waving frantically. She gave me a really weird expression and moved quickly away from me. Then I realised that I only knew her because I had stalked her Facebook once. FML
Today, at college, I found a lanyard with some keys and a YMCA member's card attached. Hoping to find contact details, I googled the name on the back of the card, just in time for him to return and see me looking through his Facebook profile like some kind of stalker. FML
Today, on my way to work, I was checking my hair in the semi-reflective window of an office building. I suddenly realized that the guy I had a one-night stand with last week was standing on the other side, looking confused. He now genuinely believes that I am stalking him. FML
Today, a cute guy I recognized from one of my classes messaged me on a dating site. He wanted help with homework. FML
Today, I decided to check out my school's quarterback's Twitter, since we have a class together. He wrote, "Dear girl in front of me, I thought you were pretty until you turned around." It was funny, until I realized the timestamp was when we have class together, and I sit in front of him. FML
Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML
Today, I made a new friend at my college campus, which was great, until I added him on Facebook and he started liking posts from 3 years ago, asking if he could be my "dirty little secret" because he knows that I have a boyfriend. FML
Today, I decided to reach out to someone I'd met randomly. I found them on social media and sent them a message. After telling my SO, he pointed out that that was stalking. I'm a creep now. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Vilefire 0
You were creeping on him and discovered him creeping on you? Seems like a fair exchange to me.
mfmylifesrsly 30
I don't really think she was creeping, she just noticed he was one fb, and then recognized her pictures on there
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (168)
TrippingOnAcid 29
I would shit my pants, and then throw the shit at him.
veggiebag 3
Should have changed you status to hey you ya you in the (insert shirts color here) get off my Facebook
phansmootchie 5
you should have updated your status to something like "I can see you creeping on me, dude"
mullisupreme 16
your fault for not having your profil viewing options set right!
thisawkwardchick 15
I would've thrown a piece of paper at him or something before very sweetly flipping him off....
HotaruGunso 19
For everyone saying OP deserves it for having her profile public, which DOESN'T make anyone an "attention *****": am I the only one who believes that she isn't upset about him simply looking at her profile but because he did it for 45 MINUTES?!?! And personally, even though I have mine set to friends of friends (which she VERY WELL could have it on, mind all of you who like to make assumptions), I couldn't care less if someone wants to glance at it briefly, even if they were a stranger, though it's not like I'd ever know. It's the fact that someone would stare at it that obsessively is what's creepy. And seriously, I don't understand how simply having it on public automatically makes one an "attention *****." It's not like she's going around friending everyone she comes across on facebook and advertising her existence to them.
HotaruGunso 19
And where did OP said she watched him the entire time as opposed to just merely glancing once at the beginning of class and again at the end? Not to mention that if he was in front of her, his laptop might have been in nearly plain sight and she could see it merely looking ahead.
ChicKenza 4
This is fate!!:) you guys will start dating by the end of the year
furubafan74 18
Post a status update: Hey guy three rows in front of me in class: I can see you stalking my page, creeper.
blondie147 10
Haha. That is hilarious. I love that idea.
TrustStolen 16
How is he the stalker if you were watching what he was doing on his laptop