Today, on my first day of work, my new boss treated me to lunch. Thinking she was really nice, I thanked her for the treat. She fixed me with a cold, unsmiling stare and said, "Oh, don't thank me. I'm being paid to do this." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my "nice" boss was only nice to me for my first month. She's now started yelling at me for every little thing. FML
Today, I excitedly got ready for my first day at my new job. I arrived on time, dressed up, only to find out they meant next Monday, not today. My new boss just gave me a weird look and said, "See you next week?" FML
Today, I was getting lunch at a fast food restaurant. My boss was in front of me, and in order to get on his good side I offered to pay. Instead, I got fired because I guess my boss assumed I was making fun of his salary, which I knew nothing about. FML
Today, my pain-in-the-ass co-worker is finally leaving. Unfortunately, I was chosen to do the bulk of her job. She has given me no training and on her last day, just smirked at me on her way out and said, "Enjoy doing my job too, fucker." I don't get paid enough for this. FML
Today, at my new job, I took some food out to a customer. Walking away, I heard a lady mumble, "Oh my God, you could never pay me enough to wear that." FML
Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML
Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML
Today, my boss called on my day off and told me to come to work. She neglected to tell me that it was simply to give me my recent paycheck after it got lost, but then she said, "Since you showed up in uniform, you might as well clock in for today. The new guy no-showed again." FML
Today, on my first day, I tried to ask my new boss a question, she visibly recoiled and actually gave me the, “I already have a boyfriend” line, and shut her door in my face, then locked it. I still need my question answered before I can start working, so I guess I’ll just sit and do nothing. FML
Today, at my new job, I walked into the office to hear my supervisor and HR manager talking about how, "the new guy isn't very smart, but we can get him to do the shit work for a couple weeks." Gee, thanks. FML
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Top comments
green_eyes124 0
Hey, it was free right?! Lucky you : )
piepieburger 0
Well, technically, so are you.
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Comments (51)
green_eyes124 0
Hey, it was free right?! Lucky you : )
Nerrage 0
No such thing as a free lunch.
starile 20
Seriously, I don't see the problem. Who cares if the boss didnt smile? I suppose all these people implying the boss is a bitch get treated out to eat by their employer often?
spaerro 8
So she's getting paid to pay for your food? Dafuq?
piepieburger 0
Well, technically, so are you.
TheOptimist 0
You should of said, "Hey, so am I!"
PurplePigeon 0
2: I like your mirror pic only because it isn't in a bathroom. :)
starile 20
22: I like your pic because it looks DELICIOUS. Did you make those yourself?
YaLubluTebya 0
well, its strictly business
iSitt 0
welcome to reality
michaelscott69 0
it's not personal, it's strictly buisness
mathew17986g 2
well what a great way to start of your new job :)
piepieburger 0
That's when you order the lobster and then decide that "your not that hungry" once it arrives.
olarvman 5
always hungry for lobster.ALWAYS!!!
Mehness 0
24 - I had lobster tails once... they were pretty badly prepared :/ They were dry D: Although I had them at TGI Fridays so that's kind of expected. Meanwhile, I had crab once at Red Lobster and it 'twas quite good :D
skittle68 0
I prefer crab to lobster.
CakeSlicer 0
Haha... that cracked me up! Im so sorry its just so funny! Anyway, FYL.
SereniLove 0
dp looks like yuri lol
MagicMushrooms 0
I think she likes you. :)
element1165 0
slap her and then piss on her
ImmaZebra 0
I sure wouldn't want to get you mad.
FFML_314 12
Light her car on fire and poison her fish.
xVictoriaDreamz 0
Wah, Wah Wah...