Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to give his mother a box of chocolates and flowers for Mother's Day. She just stared at them and said, "What's this for? You're not my daughter, and never will be. But I'll keep the chocolate." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I made my mom cookies for Mother's Day. My brother took all the cookies to work as a snack, because I didn't specifically tell him that the homemade "MOM" hearts weren't meant for him. FML
Today, I went to see my mother with my kids. Before, I had told my son to give her hugs and kisses and I would buy him candy. He did, but then he told her that I said that. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a box of chocolates as a present. A few hours later, he texted me saying that the box of chocolates contained nuts. He's allergic to nuts and his mother now thinks I'm trying to kill him. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend's parents' anniversary so I thought I'd do something to impress them. I made them chocolate-covered strawberries. But for some reason they gave me really dirty looks when they saw it. Turns out his mother is allergic to strawberries and his father is allergic to chocolate. FML
Today, I sent a $120 bouquet of flowers for mother's day. When I called tonight see if my Mom got them, she replied that they were still on the doorstep because she "didn't want the dogs to get excited and start barking" when she opened the front door to bring them in. FML
Today, I bought some flowers. As I was checking out, the cashier asked, "Aww, these for your mom? How sweet." I responded they were for a girl I liked. She laughed and said, "Sorry…" FML
Today, I got flowers sent to my work, I happily opened them in front of my co-workers thinking they were from my crush, I open the card to see "Love you, from mom". My mother thinks my love life is so pathetic, thats she needs to send me flowers to cheer me up. FML
Today, my Mom came to pay me a short visit at college. She handed me some flowers, which were a Valentine's Day gift, because she "figured I wouldn't be getting any from anyone else this year." FML
Today, my boyfriend invited me over, so I went, not thinking anything of it. To my surprise, he broke up with me. I was pretty upset, and as I was leaving his mom handed me a box. When I got home, I opened it. His mom had baked me a break-up cake. FML
Today, my mother turned up drunk at my house with a chocolate cake for my 14th birthday. I'm 27, I haven’t seen her in 6 years, I'm allergic to chocolate, and when she saw that I had 2 kids, she wanted to know why I'd bothered, since kids are always "such a disappointment". FML
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Top comments
starwind3438 9
Wow, what an ungrateful bitch.
Blueglasscup 18
Ouch. Marry him and then you can scream "WELL YOU'RE MY MOTHER IN-LAW NOW BITCH"... Actually don't do that.
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Comments (191)
robbiboyo 0
dump the mom, keep the chocolates.
Grimmerie 31
dump the chocolates, keep the mom
SlyTail 5
Just say 'Im pregnant.' That'll shut her up.
DaveOnDope 4
That's near what I'd say. Tell her that grandmothers count too. Then ask if you and her son can live with her after you guys get married.
RobinDiekmann 0
Well, you did drug her chocolates, didnt you? That's what you're supposed to do with mother-in-law chocolates!!
SpectSelf 0
why are people becoming more rude these days?
CitrusGirl 0
They're not, you just don't hear about the nice ones.
CateXOX 0
It's like how 95% of the news today is bad. It doesn't mean there's no good happening, but it does depress everyone a little.
SpectSelf 0
there still is a lot of good peole out there but I can't help but notice all the little things. example, everytime I'm buying groceries and I'm waiting in line, the person in front of me never puts the divider out. that shit is rude! then they leave the grocery carts all over the damn parking lot.
A7X_LoVeee 10
Uhh if the person is in front of you then YOU should be the one to put the divider out. I don't see how that classifies as rude though...
SpectSelf 0
so I should reach all the way in front of somebody to grab something that's closer to them?
Gallaghers 0
The cashier is suppose to push the dividers all the way to the beginning of the conveyer belt, so really it would be rude of the front person to reach behind them, over all your food and put something that your closer too. If that is your biggest problem with society, you have some serious issues and it appears you may have some anger management problems as well.
SpectSelf 0
did I ever say it was a big problem and it made me angry? no. it was just an example of rudeness. my point is if someone has their stuff on the belt and they see me behind them and they ignore the fact that I can't reach the divider, it's rude. besides why would they reach over my food when I haven't placed it on the belt? I don't see your logic.
A7X_LoVeee 10
57 - I don't know what stores you shop at but the ones I go to the dividers are all along the side most of the time. Why should the person in front put a divider behind him/her? That person is already done. You still need to put your things on the belt or whatever so you should be the one to also put the divider down.
SpectSelf 0
it's a nice gesture. you'd be surprised on how people will say thank you when you do it for them. it's like holding doors open for people. you don't have to do it, but it's nice.
SpectSelf 0
and some lines only have 1 divider and it's all the way to the front of the cashier so I can't put my stuff down until I get all the way to the front, or until I have to ask the person in front of me.
Tylerdre 6
god talking about groceries and food is making me hungry..... thabks :|
Tylerdre 6
thanks* my bad haha xD
SpectSelf 0
yeah me too. I'm cooking right now lol
nastag 10
You don't have to put a divider every time, just leave some space between your groceries and the groceries of the person in front of you. If the cashier is about to count your groceries as the other persons you can always politely correct him/her.
Muwahaha_fml 4
Awh, this sucks because you can't even go to your boyfriend because they never yell at their mothers. FYL
Livinia 11
What a stupid, ungrateful bitch.
starwind3438 9
You had to copy me huh?
Livinia 11
No, I didn't copy you.
kookiiee 0
does it matter? others may think the same
CitrusGirl 0
Should have said, "If I'll never be your daughter you'll never have my chocolate" and snagged it back. In all seriousness, tell your man. If he really cares about you he'll talk to that crazy bi- I mean his mom.
chaoskiwi 0
dang someone sure doesn't like you
CateXOX 0
Welcome to the family! And she is right, but she didn't have to be so rude about it.
DarkHelmet 10
You should marry him now just to **** up her day