Today, I went to get the Apple store, my Mac had been making a grinding noise from the fan. The guy put his ear to the keyboard and said there was a CD in the drive so I couldn't hear the grinding from the fan. He ejected the CD. It was porn. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I waited 45 minutes at the Apple Store for my grandpa to very loudly ask why PornHub wasn't loading on his computer. FML
Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML
Talk to me baby
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jerking off to what I thought was porn on his phone. He was actually beating it to Siri's voice. FML
Now casting
Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML
Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of my dad blasting porn on his computer. FML
Today, I was having computer problems, so I let my friend have remote access to fix them. We were video-chatting on Skype at the time, and so he thought it'd be hilarious to load hardcore porn in my browser the moment he saw my mom enter the room from behind me. I'm now grounded. FML
Today, I was getting ready for bed, when I decided to watch some porno on the computer. Suddenly someone from my messenger list says, "You might want to turn off the 'What You're Listening To' option if you're watching porn." I snapped and exited the porn. 63 people saw. FML
Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML
Today, right after I finished writing a very important paper and saved it to my hard drive, my barely 2-year-old Macbook decided to completely stop functioning. I went to the Apple store and even they can't get it to turn on. That's $1500 down the drain along with my grade. FML
Top comments
fbirem 2
Did you at least "get the apple store"?
katheriinex0 0
lmao, that mustve been awkward
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Comments (187)
jSOPURE 3
Everybody has their Oopsie Porno moment. Just take a look at previous Fmls. :)
may_cause_fail 0
49- that must be why his/her life is ******. :D
Shunnabunich 2
@44: Funny...the "classic" (i.e. pre-OS X) Mac operating systems had viruses, and they had only a fraction of the Mac's present market share. Since 2001, there hasn't been ONE piece of malware for OS X that could infect its way out of a paper bag, and the only software that could do malicious stuff has to be given explicit permission to do so by an administrator. So the only "malware" on OS X relies entirely on social engineering -- convincing the human, not the machine, to allow it to wreak havoc. No computer is immune to human error. People have indeed been trying to accomplish the real thing, if only to gain the cred of having finally infected a Mac. Nothing so far in ~8 years, but I'm sure you'll be the first to know. Fact is, it's just so easy to do it to Windows that it's more economical to feed into the industry that's already grown around Windows' utter lack of security. What's more plausible: that every OS out there is just as badly off as Windows, and it's "just a matter of time" until the rest of us get shown up...or that NOT all developers are as lazy and/or as hamstrung by committees as Microsoft's Windows division? Hint: Windows didn't take the market by being a quality product, because it never actually competed against other products on any kind of free market. One need only look at the Zune, the smartphone industry or Windows Live Search to see how Microsoft stands up to actual competition. And individual applications do freeze under OS X. All the time, if they're particularly badly written (i.e. MS Office, many Lexmark drivers/utilities I've had the misfortune of using, etc). The OS itself very rarely, if ever, does. I've had extensive experience using both major platforms, and in that experience, one does one's work *despite* Windows, or *with* a Mac. @OP: YDI for putting your **** on a CD and then leaving it in there. :D Really, whuh? What about a hidden folder? Thumb drive? Encrypted DMG?
_FACKMYLIFE_ 0
AHAH!! you made my day. I actually laughed out loud.. thank you :)
curryndricegirll 0
It's not a YDI because you had **** and left it there. Obviously, he wasn't leaving it there; the CD got stuck with **** on it. That's what I'm getting out of this at least. YDI, because you took your computer to the Mac store just because your computer fan started making noises. If he can't hear the sound over a CD, then it's obviously not that loud and your computer was just a little overheated.
dante_101 0
well mac doesn't supports much tweaking ... sounds boring to me... i prefer neither windows nor MAC... LINUX roxxx
log1k 3
I agree with 59 here. 31 - no such thing as PC fanboys, only Mac fanboys ;) and 38, you are absolutely wrong. You get way more bang for your buck, they are not slow and complicated, you just lack the will to learn new things. The fact of the matter is, PC's dominate 85% of the market share, which is why there are so few viruses on mac's, because those people don't want to waste their time on something with such little market. I'll always be a PC guy, but that doesn't mean I dislike mac's. I just prefer to work with PC's because I already know so much about them. Hell, I even managed to install a cracked copy of photoshop on my friends macbook for him (which was a lengthy process, considering the crack didn't work properly so i had to find a way around it). That was pretty much my 1st real experience with macs. Oh, and I was drunk. The one thing I hate about mac fanboys, they think everything in their mac world is perfect. Honestly, read the comments in here saying PC's are shit.. I don't mean to brag or start a flame war here, but I can easily build a PC that would out perform a mac, any day. In fact, my current system outperforms it no problem. I just checked out apples website, looked at the $3-4 grand MAC, and my system outperforms it, all the while saving 1000$ to pocket. So please, before any more fanboys come in here to brag about their Mac being hot shit, maybe you should take some time to learn about your ******* computer. PC's do the exact same thing as Macs, and cost so much less. Also, when was the last time you heard some one say they upgraded a part of their MAC? PC's are all about customization. I don't have to keep buying a whole new damn computer to upgrade. Waste 4 grand on something, when all I really needed was a 300$ CPU. In the end, I have nothing wrong with either machine, its the Mac fanboy's that piss me off. I guess I am bragging, and participating in this flame war...whatever, I had to get it out.
Why_Do_I_Do_This 0
horray for # 58 full support here, it is true you guys/// depending on what some platforms are better than others. and don't forget the old macs really did suck. it's a suprise they actually came back
McA513M 0
Can we just get back to the ORIGINAL topic of the **** on the CD and whatnot? The flame wars between PC's & Mac's doesn't relate here at all, and it's pointless, so just shut up! god... ANYWAY: 1. Why do you have **** on a CD? 2. How do you not know there was a CD in your hard drive? 2A. Why did you have to go into the Apple Store? There's always helpful forums online, & the built-in support system that comes with Macs. 3. Why do you care what the random-apple-guy thinks about you watching ****?
log1k 3
sorry #64, the monkey's outta the bottle now! D: