Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got a tattoo with my boyfriend's name on it. As we're coworkers, I showed it to him thinking he’d love it. He told me he couldn’t continue the relationship anymore since he realized he wants to fix things with his wife. Three hours of pain and 2 years down the drain. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is leaving me for a tattoo artist. I was in rehab and she met him getting a tattoo as a surprise for me. FML
Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML
Today, I finally met my daughter's boyfriend. He has a face tattoo. FML
Today, I realized my husband and I have been fighting a lot lately, so to show him how much I care, I got a tattoo with his name on it. He hates it. FML
Today, my girlfriend got a new tattoo - the Blink-182 logo on her stomach. I wouldn't mind it, except she got pregnant a month ago and I'm pretty sure that it can't good for the baby. FML
Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
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Top comments
yake12 0
wow! normally I would say ydi for getting a name tattoo but kids are different!! well someone else may be the father but if you raise her properly you can be her dad
hellokimmiee 5
ouch, that hurts
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Comments (255)
leilagee 5
What a bitch!
JBsGirlee 7
Father or not, that was really sweet of you, what a good daddy :) even if she isn't yours I hope you treat her with the same love
DazedSiren 5
Ouch....
Blue329 15
Well op a true man stays by his wife side no matter what.
kittenmeownyan 18
Hope you left the *****
DarthVader77 9
At least you are among the contenders for fatherhood. ;)
Elfkid21 19
id be so ******* pissed. but then id never get a tattoo of a loved-one's name because it's back luck foe the relationship you have with that person.
Meraki 19
I don't think so because it is a child, I completely understand getting a child's name tattooed on oneself because your children (should) always be your children.
stavik96 0
Well call her a ***** and dump her
juice723 9
I'm tempted today YDI because I hate tattoos. But I guess it is an FML because of the second part... It could go either way
theorist3 7
Sorry about the news... but get a DNA test to settle the paternity. Who knows, she might be your daughter. Once that is settled, look ahead to see if the marriage can be fixed.