Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Jumping the gun
Today, I got a tattoo with my boyfriend's name on it. As we're coworkers, I showed it to him thinking he’d love it. He told me he couldn’t continue the relationship anymore since he realized he wants to fix things with his wife. Three hours of pain and 2 years down the drain. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is leaving me for a tattoo artist. I was in rehab and she met him getting a tattoo as a surprise for me. FML
Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML
Today, I finally met my daughter's boyfriend. He has a face tattoo. FML
Today, I realized my husband and I have been fighting a lot lately, so to show him how much I care, I got a tattoo with his name on it. He hates it. FML
Tasteful
Today, my girlfriend got a new tattoo - the Blink-182 logo on her stomach. I wouldn't mind it, except she got pregnant a month ago and I'm pretty sure that it can't good for the baby. FML
Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
Top comments
yake12 0
wow! normally I would say ydi for getting a name tattoo but kids are different!! well someone else may be the father but if you raise her properly you can be her dad
hellokimmiee 5
ouch, that hurts
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (255)
that_geibel_girl 15
First off your wife is a *****. And why would he need permission from his wife whenever he was tattooing his believed child? I'm adopted so even if you are not the father if you want you can still take care of the child if you want. You could also fight for full custody because obviously she's not fit to be a mother.
tjw1616 21
so sorry op :( hope you find someone that deserves you!
UmbreonKirby 14
Wow...I don't know what's worse. The fact that it happened, or how people out there in this world genuinely believe he deserved it...
bluntmanhaze 3
Wow what a lil bitch another thing u should run by her before doing something hahaha
bobbabson 8
Take the kid and run
ballkrusher14 8
Ur wife is a ****
slimashli 7
drop that ******* ****
fantasyworld 39
That is messed up.
cronagorgon 11
Take the kids inside and kick her outside
dannnngthatsux 19
What a skankasaur! Sorry to tell you dude, the courts are going to make you pay child support even if she's not yours. When you started taking care of her they say that even though you didn't know she wasn't yours, you said yes to a permanent contract. Hope she really is yours.