Today, I went to confession. I told the priest that I had an intimate relationship with a woman that I'm not married to. He chuckled and said, "You know, lying is a sin too." I wasn't lying. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was in confession telling my sins to the priest, he called me a "pain in the ass." FML
Today, while helping at my grandma's church, the new Orthodox Priest encouraged me to come to confession because he was sure I would have "a lot of stories to tell" and finished by seductively winking at me. FML
Today, I lied and told my friends I was a compulsive liar. Well, I think I lied. FML
Today, one of my employees lied to his mother and told her that I’m his girlfriend, so she actually came to invite me to Sunday dinner. Nice woman, but I had to tell her he lied, since I’m married, to my wife. She kicked up a huge stink in the shop and accused me of using her son for "hetero sex". FML
Today, some guy I’ve been talking to showed up at my house while I was on video call with my boyfriend. I had to confess to a stupid situation I had no business being in. FML
Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I like, who also happens to be my coworker. She told my boss, and they're laughing about it as I type this. FML
Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML
Today, I went to my dad, hoping to confess something to him. He quickly said that if I'd got my girlfriend pregnant, he'd kill me. That's exactly what happened. I had to make up a lie instead about stealing $50 from his wallet once as a kid, which he then demanded I pay back in full. FML
Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML
Today, at a bar, a drunk girl kissed me, so I went home and confessed what happened to my girlfriend. She forgave me but took it as permission to admit she’s cheated sexually at least once a month for over a year, then got mad I didn’t immediately forgive her like she forgave me. FML
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Top comments
LeChuck 0
Well (by being catholic) you made your own bed now lie in it love me some sin
greenfinch 0
Ouch.
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Comments (85)
babydoll86_fml 0
Oh snap! You got burned, haha. But really, that's kinda sad that your priest didn't believe you/joked about it. Clearly unprofessional. Next time, just confess straight to the G-man himself :P
Red_Wing_Nut44 14
Yes, but we Catholics also believe the priest is acting as a means if communucation between God and the person. Get your facts straight before you start bashing, asshole.
xqme 0
i'm troubled to see so many people automatically assume it was a guy going to a confessional... but then again, maybe i'm just a newbie and everyone knows churchgoer is a mr... @_@a
mattz_fml 0
Or you could, you know, become a real Christian and stop going to these "confessions."
wkcthird 0
# 42 if hes catholic, which he probably is if he went to a priest for confession, then thats not valid as a sacrament and he wouldnt be pardoned for his sins but hey on the bright side it still counts, whether or not the priest believes you
willma 0
bahah, oh what a line by the priest, i would like to sit there in those booths all day and just do that to people, i would find so much enjoyment from it =D
whynotlive 0
ouch...
arcangel81 0
your priest is awesome...
IAmBridgette 0
Lmao, props to the priest. xDD
kitsuneluvuh 12
Why would he think you were lying?
ziqi92 0
ah yes, religion! what would we do without it...