Today, I went to boxing and this hot chick asked me if I was wearing a sports cup. I replied yes, when I wasn't. I thought she was going to check with her hand and feel. She checked with her knee. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, one of my baseball teammates thought it would be funny to perform a "cup-check", by hitting our crotches with the end of a baseball bat. I was actually watching the game, so I didn't see him when he came up and hit me. I wasn't wearing a cup. My nuts have shrunk by half of regular size. FML
Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said, "Nice chair." She replied, "Nice bruise" and punched me in the nuts. FML
Today, I was at a football game with my boyfriend. I said my hands were getting cold, hoping he'd hold them. He replied, "Uh, they make pockets for a reason..." and physically showed me how to put my hands in my pockets. FML
Today, I got punched in the face by a girl for asking if she was okay after I had seen her crying. FML
Today, my friend invited me to his boxing club for the first time. Since I'm somewhat short and scrawny-looking, he was worried that the workout would be too difficult for me. I waved him off and told him that I was tougher than I looked. Five minutes into class, I sprained my ankle. FML
Today, while working at the bar, I had a beautiful woman squeeze my bicep and tell me I was in amazing shape. Instead of flirting like any normal human being, I awkwardly said, "Thanks…" and then walked away in shame. FML
Today, at the camp that I work at, a little girl asked to "feel" my muscles. Thinking it was cute, I flexed for her. She laughed and said, "No, really." FML
Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. Five seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the Hacky Sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML
Today, I was in the gym when I noticed three trainers who worked there staring at me. Thinking that they were checking me out, i turned the speed on the treadmill higher. Finally one of the trainers came over, and asked me to leave until I got a sports bra that actually worked. FML
Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
SirSantpoort 0
YDI for lying.
GavinRoskamp 0
Idiot.
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Comments (237)
skittles88 0
someones not having kids:)
fxxxmylyfe 0
that is insanely idiotic of you... nice going.
ReptarOzoneKing 0
roses are red violets are blue your a dumbass I'm glad she kicked you :D
fadingaway 17
107 ftw
xgetxbentx 13
ydi for being such a desperate perv you had to try and trick a girl into touching you.
Deemon_Cat 0
Dude, you should've known.
israelnotjacob 20
Wow... you seriously expected that she was going to confirm you were by feeling your crotch area when you must not even know each other? You are beyond pathetic. Obviously you weren't going to be expecting her to knee you in the crotch, but if you were expecting her to feel you down there then you couldn't possibly deserve this any more. If anything she should have kicked you as hard as is humanly possible. That would be more just.
Mariax_fml 2
Go girl! :p
WoAhAnNa123 0
why would u say yes?!?!
bittersweet1 0
yes, thats what girls want to do is feel a cup. psh.... wtf you deserve it.