EpicMayonnaise
United States
Today, I went to a club. The only guy who asked me to dance introduced himself as "Bird Dog." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Qualicum Beach, Canada
Today, desperate to meet a guy, I went clubbing. The only guy to show any interest opened with, "You're hot, for a black chick!" FML
poorclubgoer
United States
Rave on
Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML
I Tried
Burton, United States
Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML
Anonymous
United States
The Lady in Red
Today, I was at a party. The music changed to a slow dance. Everybody grabbed a partner and I was left on the dancefloor alone. Suddenly, this guy walked up to me. I swore that he was going to ask me to dance. He then said, "Could you hold me my drink?" and went to dance with another girl. FML
divingconfidence
Maple Grove, United States
Don't even try
Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML
KL.
Canada
Misleading
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
IcantDance!
Daphne, United States
Today, although I can't dance, I decided to go to a club. A really cute girl asked me to dance, and I politely declined. She kept insisting, so I finally said okay. A few minutes in, she stopped, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make fun of my dancing, I'm leaving." FML
cakestar9
Ennis, Ireland
Today, I went to a club to celebrate New Year's Eve. A cute guy came up to me at the bar and asked my name. I thought my 8 year long dry spell was finally about to end. I smiled and said "Chrissy!" He said "That's a whore's name!" and wandered back off into the crowd. FML
Anonymous
Rocklin, United States
Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I met a really nice guy. He was funny, handsome, and we were both into each other. He told me his name, and when I replied with mine, it came out sounding like "I'm a bear." FML
Top comments
slushpup9696 12
Maybe that's his name, and he'll be posting an FML soon about a girl who refused to dance with him because of his name.
slushpup9696 12
Yeah. I hate my name, Hospital Ceiling. Everyone makes fun of me and turns me down at dances.
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Comments (140)
vistaskies 0
At least he ASKED you to dance. There are a lot of sleazy guys at clubs that will just come up and grind on you whether you want to dance with them or not.
khaya 9
You are then required to say, get back in your cage and do the chicken dance.
cicatrice_fml 8
Well, it IS Texas after all. Maybe he thought you would be turned on by the hunting metaphor.
irishboy1990 0
bird dog is a car salesman term
bubo_fml 11
Coulda been worse...His name coulda been something like...Phil McCrackin, Seymore Butz, Dick Hertz, Peter Whackins, Ben Dover, Ivan Tasnach, Jack Madik, Heywood Jablomi, Paul Mypole, Willi Sukimov, Al Spunkonabitsch, Dixie Normiss...(Just to name a few!)
yomommma 6
At least someone asked you to dance.
shivablaze 7
I'll tell you where you went wrong OP: You went to a club and waited to be asked to dance. It's a club. Just dance. I do this all the time with my friend, and let me tell you, we get way more guys coming up to use that the lame ass girls who sit around looking pretty and hoping to be approached by guys. I don't get girls who can't get this simple concept. People like confidence in a mate, and what do you think expresses confidence more? Standing around moping, or being out on the dance floor having a really good time?
a_nutritionist 10
...since when is the number of guys dancing with you an indicator of a successful night?
shivablaze 7
Apparently it is for her. I consider it a successful night if the music was awesome and I had a fun time dancing. I actually find the guys get in the way sometimes. The point is, if you dance, you're way more likely to get guys. Whether you want to or not. You don't need a guy to ask you to dance at a club.
BloodyMary666 24
This made me LOL! xD
Tookie22 5
a super drunk "bernard" which turned into a birdog? FHL for a stupid name. and FYL because nobody wants to dance with you haha
born_hustla 26
A cross between birdman & snoop dogg?!